Seren

Member since March 14, 2009

Member for 17 years, 2 months

member

666 Poems

13,838 Comments

26 Followers

Most recent

lonely heart

Posted Jun 23, 2023 · 40 lines · 9 critiques

I felt you drift away
as the tethers slipped,
I knew I'd be alone
ties that bound were clipped

I always knew that day
would eventually come around,
I know that it's a wonder
I couldn't hear an earthly sound

I watched as your chest fell
you took that final gasp,
and all around was silent
as your body I'd enclasped

As I held on for a dear life
I didn't know up from down,

Read the rest of the poem Show less

knowing I had to say goodbye
the tears I shed would drown

As I laid you back
softly on your sheet,
slowly sitting down
was a mammoth feat

Saying those silent farewells
in the hours that followed,
statue still I was shadow
my insides had been hollowed

As the months have rolled by
I have gone through the motions,
a ghost to life and laughter
I've been devoid of all emotion

This loss was like no other
and this grief has torn a hole,
right through my very centre
I no longer feel I'm whole

I don't know how to go on
without the man that made me,
so, I come and go in the telling
until from this pain, I'm free

I know he'd want me to go on
but how does one feel alive,
can joy fill my veins again
and a lonely heart be revived?

Seren’s timeline

March 2024
13 Wed

Anniversary
15 years of membership
February 2024
18 Sun

Critiqued
"Aussieland is Calling..." by @Geezer
"With our love we can save the world. - George Harrison The fact that we've never met. But the love lives here in this place, amongst you beautiful souls. Oh oh oh I think I have a poem ruminating. I love you big bro. Hi…"
18 Sun

Critiqued
"Just Another Burning Bush ... (by: eddy styx)" by @Candlewitch
"Omg l'm absolutely in awe of this one Sis. I'm so happy you took my speechless-ness as the compliment it was? Is that a word. l can't be sure lol Love you sis have a wonderful birthday xxx"
18 Sun

Critiqued
"Just Another Burning Bush ... (by: eddy styx)" by @Candlewitch
"I'm speechless Love always Lilbit xxx"
November 2023
15 Wed

Received a critique
on lonely heart from @kowque
"To finish this piece It was too real too triggering You have such a gift"
03 Fri

Received a critique
on lonely heart from @Clentin
"Your poem brings out clearly the tragic loss of a loved one. Emotion is evident in each stanza. A poem to remember. Thank you for a sad but lovely poem."
June 2023
30 Fri

Received a critique
on lonely heart from @Candlewitch
"congrats on your win! you deserve it! *love and cookies, Cat"
30 Fri

Received a critique
on lonely heart from @Candlewitch
"I got it right away, with the lines: I don't know how to go on without the man that made me, so, I come and go in the telling until from this pain, I'm free the second line says it plainly; who the man was. I hung on yo…"
29 Thu

Received a critique
on lonely heart from @Unca Fez
"I felt a loss when my parents passed, but there wasn't the closeness that is described here. However, I am expecting something similar to this if I survive my Cat. On days where she has not been home when I was, due to…"
29 Thu

Received a critique
on lonely heart from @Jenifer James
"This took me back to so many farewells, Seren. I worked in palliative care for years and it never became easier, watching the grief of others. I love that line 'a ghost to life and laughter' - it's so strong, that feeli…"
24 Sat

Received a critique
on lonely heart from @RoseBlack
"This brought a tear to my eye. I dread the day when my dad is no longer with me. Sending big hugs. Thank you for being such a great friend."
24 Sat

Contest commendation
Neopoem of the week June 18th to June 24th 2023

with "lonely heart".
23 Fri

Received a critique
on lonely heart from @Geezer
"very emotional. I don't see anything to fix, other than making it clear that you are speaking of your Dad. Love and higgest bugs, to my Aussie Sis. ~ Geez. ."
23 Fri

Critiqued
"OBSERVATIONS ( A love poem without the word love)" by @scribbler
"Oh god!! This is absolutely one of your best poems. With out love huh? It's all love and it burns every so bright even after all those years. Oh, to be loved like this. Sigh sigh sigh. Bravo!! love always Sis x p.s. I w…"
23 Fri

Critiqued
"Stones Into Diamonds" by @Michael Anthony
"I kind of feel like I was a voyeur on a very private moment, but what a beautiful moment it is. Thanks so much for sharing this, it's absolutely brilliant, there isn't a word I would change!! Bravo!! Kind Regards Seren"
23 Fri

Critiqued
"Passages of Rhyme" by @Candlewitch
"I think this is something that most of us go through at times in our lives, if it's not dance? its sport or music or something else. There is always something we feel that we are lacking in in some sense. I absolutely l…"
23 Fri

Critiqued
"Live Letters..." by @Geezer
"Wow, I live this one and love it as well. I love it when you tell stories about your family and those in it, I almost feel like I know them in a sense. I went through this a few times I can't see anything I'd change. I…"
23 Fri

Critiqued
"Addling" by @Lavender
"I felt my heart breaking, I felt for them both, and then I read your afterword and my heart broke all over again. This is absolutely brilliant. I felt bereft. It's the only word i can find at the moment that explains th…"
23 Fri

Posted a poem
lonely heart
"I felt you drift away"
Open thread 40 lines
18 Sun

New follower
@Jenifer James
18 Sun

New follower
@Unca Fez
18 Sun

Posted a poem
Just not today
"I should have let you in"
Open thread 21 lines
17 Sat

Posted a poem
My lost and found
"From birth"
Open thread 45 lines
16 Fri

Posted a poem
I want nothing more.
"To make it clear,"
Open thread 24 lines
15 Thu

Posted a poem
Shrouds of dream
"I hear the whispers"
Open thread 28 lines
14 Wed

Posted a poem
Raw
"With a single notion"
Open thread 30 lines
13 Tue

Posted a poem
sightless wondering
"We sat on fallow ground"
Open thread 30 lines
May 2023
26 Fri

New follower
@Lavender
23 Tue

Posted a poem
A hidden gaze
"There is nothing left of life"
Open thread 65 lines
March 2023
29 Wed

Posted a poem
Damning sorrow for love
"when I heard"
Open thread 41 lines
18 Sat

Posted a poem
Untitled
"I wore fear"
Open thread 32 lines
07 Tue

Posted a poem
The weight of love
"I want to once again"
Open thread 31 lines
06 Mon

Posted a poem
Pathway to the Pleiades
"I have chosen"
Open thread 36 lines
02 Thu

New follower
@Abby
February 2023
28 Tue

Contest commendation
February 2023 Challenge Chariot To Hell

with "Twenty horses & A Chariot to Hell ".
January 2023
31 Tue

Contest commendation
January 2023 Challenge My Freestyle

with "January 2023 Challenge: my Freestyle. ".
31 Tue

First contest commendation
January 2023 Challenge My Freestyle

with the poem "January 2023 Challenge: my Freestyle. ".
21 Sat

Contest commendation
Neopoem Of The Week January 15th to January 21st 2023

with "Symphony in the Stars ".
March 2019
13 Wed

Anniversary
10 years of membership
June 2014
20 Fri

Posting milestone
500 poems posted
March 2014
13 Thu

Anniversary
5 years of membership
June 2010
28 Mon

Critique milestone
10,000 critiques given
April 2010
23 Fri

Most-discussed work
"Attention Fleur MacDonald's friends and Members of Neopoet ~!" "UPDATE on the Update LOL "Message"

69 critiques to date.
March 2010
15 Mon

Highest posting month
March 2010 — 30 poems
13 Sat

Anniversary
One year of membership
December 2009
28 Mon

Critique milestone
5,000 critiques given
August 2009
10 Mon

Posting milestone
100 poems posted
July 2009
06 Mon

Critique milestone
1,000 critiques given
March 2009
17 Tue

First critique offered
on "The Whippoorwill" by @themoonman
15 Sun

First publication
A Letter to My Mother
13 Fri

Joined Neopoet
Membership begins

First poem published 1 days later.

About Me

About me

I started at Neopoet in March 2007, I was Chair on the old (AEC) before the crash, I was also a guide and I have been taught by some of the best poetic minds on the planet. If you're looking to improve your poems this is a breeding ground of truly great poets.

Please don't hesitate to contact me of you have need of advice or help in anyway.

Location: Beyond the Black Stump..Australia, AUS

Favorite Poets

Pablo Neruda

P.K.Page

W.H.Auden

to many and various to include them all ...

>> View all work

Contest Wins

Winning Submission	Contest	Contest Date
lonely heart	Neopoem of the week June 18th to June 24th 2023	18 June, 2023 – 24 June, 2023
Twenty horses & A Chariot to Hell	February 2023 Challenge Chariot To Hell	1 February, 2023 – 28 February, 2023
Symphony in the Stars	Neopoem Of The Week January 15th to January 21st 2023	15 January, 2023 – 21 January, 2023
January 2023 Challenge: my Freestyle.	January 2023 Challenge My Freestyle	3 January, 2023 – 31 January, 2023

Workshops

		Skill level:
Cellar Door	(syllabus)	Olympic Pool	Started 2019-03-27	Concluded
Poets first poems	(syllabus)	Splash Pool	Started 2017-06-23	Concluded
Abstract words and abstract poetry	(syllabus)	Olympic Pool	Started 2016-05-01	Concluded
To serve poet.	(syllabus)	Wading Pool, Splash Pool, Olympic Pool, Plunge Pool	Started 2014-05-22	Concluded
The right amount of imagery (let's begin)	(syllabus)	Splash Pool	Started 2014-02-26	Concluded
The Complete Poem- Start to Finish	(syllabus)	Olympic Pool	Started 2014-01-14	Concluded
THE RIGHT WORD .....Let's get started	(syllabus)	Wading Pool	Started 2013-11-25	Concluded
GREAT POETRY (a workshop)	(syllabus)	Splash Pool	Started 2013-01-19	Concluded
Eternal Renga Continues	(syllabus)	Wading Pool, Splash Pool, Olympic Pool, Shark Pool, Plunge Pool	Started 2012-11-07	Concluded
fixed verse – it's not a curse	(syllabus)	Olympic Pool, Plunge Pool	Started 2012-10-28	Concluded