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Namaste

At dusk
my palms join,
I look east then west,
In welcome and farewell,
I open them
chanting mantras of gratitude.

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 

Comments

N
A
M
E
S
T
E

What is it called
it's on the tip of my mind
just a slip away.......

It is popularly known as Namaste but at times Namaskar. Thanks for reading Lovedly.
............................................

raj (sublime_ocean)

author comment

and respect for the day passed.
Pure and simple.
Nice raj...

.
And that's how I see it,
Mark

for reading and your good words...I wasn't aware that you are part of Neopoet's Social Media team until I saw just now that you found this worthy to include in the "potential submissions to instagram" folder with a nice picture of dusk....i thank you and IRiz for this initiative...she too creates great pics..

thanks again..
..................................

raj (sublime_ocean)

author comment

I think we all will make a great team.
Later,

.
And that's how I see it,
Mark

N ew day all adorn
A nother one will be born
M y salaams to the one gone
E ast is the early dawn
S un the West is about to gulp
T hen we will offer divine prayers
E ven Lord wants me now to rest

I shal remove it once you have read raj

appreciate your effort Lovedly...thanks
.............................

raj (sublime_ocean)

author comment

a and e interpolated
You want me to remove it
say so pl I will

Raj
I like the idea of the poem very much!
My only concern is the structure of your sentences.
Take a look I wrote this as a suggestion to make better flow. I keep the essence of the poem.

At dusk
my palms join.
I look east then west.
In welcome and farewell
I open them
chanting greatful mantras.

IRiz

Thanks friend IRiz for the wonderful suggestive change...appreciated and will be implemented...i will just check if it should be greatful or grateful....

i changed the concluding line from "chanting grateful mantras" to "chanting mantras of gratitude"
...please tell me which one is better and has a better flow?

Thanks again..
...............................................

raj (sublime_ocean)

author comment

my friend, you know better, this is your poetry
i am just super tired and trying (not always the best way) to help
hugs

i love you last draft very much, let's ask Mark to redo your insta-post

IRiz

very much appreciate your tireless efforts dear friend as too your guidance..Mark may do the post if it's not too much trouble...

warmly..
....................................................

raj (sublime_ocean)

author comment

Namaste

IRiz

Namaste to you too IRiz..
..............................

raj (sublime_ocean)

author comment

My pleasure.

.
And that's how I see it,
Mark

Namaste Mark...appreciate your help
..............................................

raj (sublime_ocean)

author comment

I believe the In at the 4th verse should be lower case (in) to be grammatically correct.
Regards,

.
And that's how I see it,
Mark

you are spot on about ...if you are going to redo the post on instagram please correct that and you may as well get rid of punctuation marks as suggested by IRiz...

thanks mate...
.......................................

raj (sublime_ocean)

author comment
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