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Sunku 8

Love lost

Future loss

Tears falling

Editing stage: 


3 stanzas, 2/3/4 syllables per line. This is far off but very good. My reading

Jess, Neopoet Directors
Neopoet is a workshop. Poets take the time to read and think about your work and offer suggestions.
There is no obligation to make any changes however please acknowledge critique and comments.

Your Sunku does express the fear to move on in life after a bad experience ...the third stanza apparently expresses sadness for even thinking about moving on...

I agree with Jess that there is room to work on this to conform to Sunku ...i am sure you will be able to do it...third stanza is too open to read ...


raj (sublime_ocean)

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