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Ravenel

Born into magick royalty
the one sent by the Goddess
who would set them free.

From conception forward
his destiny defined.
But in a dream
to his mother
the oracle, Riobhlinn, prophesised.
Written in blood
was Ravenel’s early demise.

With dark forces
landing on the shore,
the Queen made
a painful choice
to let her baby go.

Placing a bronze amulet
around his neck,
so as he would never forget,
down the crystal pool of reflection
he went.
Through a portal in time
to world unknown
an entire kingdom left to mourn.

She sat every day
by the crystal pool
pining for her son
her only one
what more could she do?

Years went by
and the baby
became a man.
All though he had what he needed
there was still something missing
his soul, not completely whole.

There was a yearning,
a lesson to be learned.
A part of him he did not know
his powerful lineage
beginning to show.
The amulet glowed
around his neck
telling him
which way to go.

Following the feeling
to a golden light,
disappearing from
all he knew was right.

Back through the portal
in which he came,
to the shores of Awenyiddion
where his mother lay.

Reaching down,
he touched her skin.
Wiping silver strands of ageless beauty
taking her hand.

Slowly she awoke
first taken by fear.
Who was this stranger
why was he so near?

Then it hit her
a mother never forgets her son.
the twinkle in his eye
same as when he was born
Her Little Lord Ravenel
had finally come home.

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 

Comments

A lovely story, I think that Ravenel should have more told of his life on the other side of the portal, see if he can enhance his being on that side so that he glows and then returns to seek his mothers love..
Reading this I have to get on with my piece that is for this workshop, but I have spent a lot of time goading people in a good way, to write soppy ones of where they live, Rula and Jayne ) and I have challenged them to see if I can write as good as they will about their own homeland.
Maybe I have to write one of New York but we will see what happens..
A tiny Typo in the first two lines young lady:-

Born into magick royalty (Magic)
the one sent by Goddess ( I would suggest sent by A Goddess----- or The Goddess see what you think..
Yours as always. Ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

I am glad you enjoyed the read and the story. Magick was misspelled on purpose. It is how the Pagan's spell the word. Ravenel's lineage is rooted in Celtic Paganism. The world in which he was born into (before he was sent away) is based around the customs of Celtic Pagan culture and living. I will need to work on a second part of this story, while revising some of my other story pieces. I toyed with the idea of adding "the" in that one line..i think I am going to plug it in and see how it does :) Thanks for your suggestions and the read!!

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

author comment

Your write is Magick lol,
Yours Ian.T.xx

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

It was fun to go back into the archives and pull out some old stuff. I had forgotten how much of it was pretty good but with some tweaking and guidance, can be better. The ones I chose were the ones I liked the most and thought had the most potential....most are story pieces so we shall see where they go from here...

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

author comment

On your Answer it was written that you cried.
Now as that came through with your words it is so.
The children.... I will ask Rebecca to drop by and watch over you.
She is there already and has sent a lot of emotion.
This is yours so there are words to write I shall leave you with them, Yours Ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

more times than anyone can imagine...I use writing as an outlet...I know I have said that before...Who is Rebecca? Is she one of the children? How is it you knew I cried? I am fascinated by all of this...

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

author comment

I have contact with the children of Spirit, they tell me of the tears.
But that is because you are not thinking as you should.
Rebecca is a child of around 8 and a half, going on 9 and a half years old.
Sadie at some time in the past (Just before Now) rescued her from being lost, and since then Rebecca has stayed with Sadie helping her with her work of rescuing children that can't understand what has happened to them when they are alone to cross over.
Over the past few years I have been privileged to be able to talk with Sadie and some of the children, I find them at play and they have made a seat for me at the side of their play area.
I have told them that I will join them in their work when I return home.
I have been told that I have finished my allotted tasks here, yet I have much to do, but that is another story and a leap of faith.
I want you to think of Rebecca and come back to me telling me what she is like LOL just think and she will be there as the first thing you see.
Yours Ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

I will look for Rebecca as I am sure she is near. She is my son's age, so perhaps there is a connection there. He is troubled and needs guidance as well, perhaps one of your children can look out for him too. On a writer's note, do you think it would be beneficial for me to write an introduction to Ravenel...before I compose the next stage of his journey. i was just reviewing your contribution to the workshop and was wondering if I should do the same....

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

author comment

My intro was to clarify a few words and titles such as Catastrophe and his mate Believe the writer..
When Ravenel's life in the world he went to away from his mother is written then maybe a short intro may be needed as to their world and when they were freely moving around it, but this one of yours can be as it is..
Robert is there with Rebecca, but Robert has never spoken a word, he think talks with the other children which is fine but just let them sort it out.
The tears have stopped for now, that is good,
Take care the link is fading just enjoy the things you have,
Yours ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

The next installment of Ravenel's life and journey will prolly require some short writing/introduction in the beginning as I give a background to his destiny as well as who he was after he was sent away. I really do enjoy story telling, I just seem to be able to do it better through poetry. We shall see how it works out....

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

author comment

about the story line between Killer and Nevermore. I think I will start it off with the next date and see where it takes us. Killer is besotted! He gets so little romance in his life, that he really treasures the ones he has. I think they should have dinner. As you know, Killer is a great chef. She should bring someone FOR dinner! LOL
Good to see you hauling out some of the old stuff, and making it better. Love ya,~Gee

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I have alot of pieces that have potential....ian pointed out my ability to tell a story through poetry...so here it goes nevermore says she will bring dinner if killer finds dessert...she has heard of his talents in the kitchen....love ya

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

author comment

Has Ravenel been to Charleston, I was reading the newspaper there the other day The Post and Courier and there was a story there about, the former State Treasurer, Thomas Ravenel, and his scrape with the law LOL Is he a relative to your Ravenel ??? I had to bail him out for $600 hope I get it back.
Look forward to your next write, Yours Ian.T
PS:- I wish they would start some more workshops there seems to be a gap in the market..

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

They could be distant relatives but my Ravenel is a gentlemen. He has an important destiny and holds himself to high standards. He is the guy every mother would like their daughter to bring home, of course he has his faults, no one is perfect....workshops..yes I would like to see some different ones pop up. I am currently working on Ravenel's next piece, in the mean time I am posting others, as you can see. Going to see what I can pull out of the archives and rework too. One story telling piece at a time, the rest fill in the gaps until I get it worked out....

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

author comment
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