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Black Riding Hood

Through the darkened woods
Black Riding Hood ran.
Crushing the dirt
beneath her combat boots
to Grandmother's house
fast as she can.

Grinning with fangs
curled under deviant lips,
the Bad Wolf leapt.
Stopped Black Riding Hood
cold in her tracks.

I see you're alone
you must be afraid.
Would you be offended
if I walked with you a ways?

Black Riding Hood
stared unimpressed.
Stop wasting my time
I have some place to be.
Beat it, Wolf
Go climb a tree.

The wolf continued, undaunted
growling deep in his chest.
Circled Black Riding
breathing her scent.

A young girl, like you,
shouldn't be alone
this late at night.
Someone could give you
a terrible fright.

Someone like you,
Black Riding laughed.
I quiver with dread,
sorry to disappoint you, Wolf
think you have me confused
with that fairy tale freak
Little Red!

Baring his teeth, the Wolf
gave one last chance.
All right Black Riding Hood,
I'm through playing
it's time to dance!

Reaching into her basket
filled with "goodies"
Black Riding Hood
unsheathed her favorite machete.

Make one wrong move
and I'll cut your ass.
Turn you into a carpet
before your body hits the grass.

The wolf snarled and snapped
Stupid whore, I have you trapped.

Like hell you do,
Black Riding Hood saw red.
Out of my way
before you bite off
more than you can chew.

Lunging, the wolf
pinned her down,
knocking the machete
from her hand.

Well, little girl,
what to do?
Grandma must be wondering
what happend to you

Pulling at his fur
banging on his chest
screaming, WHAT DO YOU WANT
YOU MANGY BASTARD?
Before her hands
finally came to rest.

Licking her lips
down her neck,
the wolf murmured inaudibly
as he went.

Black Riding Hood shuddered
with every stroke.
This wasn't the end
the wolf couldn't win.
Her head began to spin.

Something glistened
catching her eye.
If only she could reach
it was worth a try....

Go on, do what you will
you're going to anyway.
Black Riding Hood regretted to say.

The wolf chuckled
as his mouth circled her breasts.
Oh, Black Riding Hood
you're going to love it this way!

Not as much as this,
she cried grabbing her knife.
Twisting the blade
deep in his back
hearing the sinews crack.

The wolf howled
as he writhed in pain.
The little bitch beat him
at his game.

Blood spattered
covering the ground.
Then all fell quiet,
just Black Riding around.

The trees bowed
acknowledging her conquest
the moon glittered with pride.

She rolled the wolf off of her,
wiping down her threads.
It was off to play poker
now that the asshole was dead.

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing stage: 

Comments

but of what of Twenty one...

Im something of a card player...catch me if you can

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

author comment

cachel cards are a mystery
but the multiple complexity of random order
and chaos theory drives me to shivers....

The story of my life...bet I would make you shiver...

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

author comment

sensations from without...
but it is the reaction from within
that great reflection
of an echo...
that travels the infintismal delved
miles or millenium

that echo....that touch
that drive

shiver.....yes

to touch, human touch
to seduction, heated passion
shivers from pleasure, ecstasy

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

author comment

sometimes we refrain from touch
treasure
coveted as a moon fall
in the bruise of dusk

the shores caress
alive in my ears
the cigarette draped in a fingertips crush

I am not alone
the ghosts the moments
fill the halls
the home

I remember the summers
heat
the hearts
the thighs press
on car rides
through roadways
escorted with the fire
of lightening bugs
and the burning
aurora above....

but you have me writing
and thats the matter of
fact..

sitting here in the depths
of the library
where long
ago the angel came
and found me

....

drew me out and through
the streets of fall
the leaves dripping
in the honey dusk

the light on the light
like spirits
the fragments
winking

to the longing for belonging
remembering how it made us feel
to feel close to someone
to live for them, with them
to stir emotions
thought to be buried
deep within

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

author comment

I seldom comment on poems that don't want raw truth, and I comment on good poems even less, as there isn't any point.
But this is really good, and I wanted to say so.
My one and only criticism is that I would like to see and read it with a more rigid verse structure, perhaps quatrains, or rhyming couplets.

Great fun, very enjoyable, and very good to read.

Respectfully, Jim

"Laws and Rules don't kill freedom: narrow-minded intolerance does" - Race-9togo

http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/Race_9togo

I am not much good with rhyme and I am working on structure with Wesley. I dont mind the raw truth so feel.free to tear it apart. I really need to state that. Thanks for the read and for the suggestions.

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

author comment
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