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Remorse

Life is not fair
We have heard it before
Take the good with the bad
Even if it leaves you sad

Grey clouds hang loosely
Weeping for what is lost
Only they know that this pain
Certainly has no gain

There are no winners here

I am not perfect
Nor will I ever pretend to be
If he only knew that i really did try
If he only knew how many tears i did cry

The end was inevitable
Though not an easy choice to make
Yet it happened all the same
Leaving me unprepared when it came

So many questions that have no answer
I often wonder if i had done more to change
Would the outcome have been the same
Maybe he was right, and i am really to blame

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 

Comments

ask ourselves that question some time In our lives. "How much should I blame myself?"
Introspection is not an easy road. I think that you have tried hard to give us a picture of what most of us feel when life hands us lemons. We can't always make lemonade. if you don't like lemons, it's alright to throw them away. But, don't buy anymore! I'm not too sure of this new style of rhyme or even if it is a new style, but it keeps the pace and that is ok by me! Keep it up and you will be able to connect even better with the reader. ~ Gee.
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Something a little different. I am not sure either how it fits in but rhyme and i have a love hate relationship so i am working on it slowly. Self reflection is difficult. More to come

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

author comment

OK, if this is based on fact, I am sorry for you but should point out that there should never be any reason to change. You should be able to accept each other for what you are. Now for the poem. Where you choose to use rhyme you should also choose rhythm. The two go together like bacon and eggs. The first two verses here demonstrate that you are capable of writing within the said constraint. So you should eventually end up with something along these lines.

Life is not fair
We have heard it before
Take the good with the bad
Even if it leaves you sad

Grey clouds hang loosely
Weeping for what is lost
Only they know that this pain
Certainly has no gain

There are no winners here

I am not perfect
Nor did I pretend to be
If he knew how I tried
or the tears that I cried.

An inevitable end
Not the choice I would make
Yet it happened just the same
I was unprepared when it came

Questions without answer
Had I done more to change
Would it turn out the same
Am I really to blame?

Keith Logan
the happy chappy
https://www.neopoet.com/community-guidelines

Rhyme and i have a love hate relationship. I am learning to love it and use it correctly. Thank you for the suggestions. I will make edits when i have a chance this weekend.

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

author comment

It takes two to make but only one to break. There is no point in trying to continue a relationship the other party has already walked away from.

Keith Logan
the happy chappy
https://www.neopoet.com/community-guidelines

Unfortunately too many women put up with abuse in the vain hope things will improve, all the while deluding themselves that he loves them really. Brutes like that love only themselves.

Keith Logan
the happy chappy
https://www.neopoet.com/community-guidelines

For the response. I am not a perfect person and i never want to be considered a victim but it is important that someone does hear me and understand....thank you all

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

author comment
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