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Next time we meet

Submitted by Seren on Sat, 2023-02-11 11:11

I'm wondering when
next time we meet,
what form we'll take
in the next heartbeat

Will we be the rays
that blaze from the sun,
or could we be sprays
from when time began

Maybe as nightingales
we’ll sing to the moon,
or maybe as wolves
we’ll sing our own tune

Would that we shifted
dimensions and time,
maybe our hearts will
beat the same rhyme

Maybe as echos
through deserts vast,
or maybe a comet
that moseys on past

Will we be leaves
that glisten the trees,
or will we be wind
that blows to the seas

Whatever we will be
whatever we become,
I will wait eternally
Singing your anthem

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words: 
For Dad.
Editing stage: 
Editing - draft
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

Lightning Dust

Sat, 2023-02-11 11:46

Lightning Dust's picture

I wish I'd have met your father, he must have been a good bloke & you loved him like a little demon. Grief is hard to bear but I've never lost a parent. I can't imagine that kind of loss. This is a beautiful poem you've taken what was a crushing day and turned it into something exquisite, J said. I just read it to her.

Frigging awesome piece of writing girlie

We love you! L & J

Seren

Mon, 2023-02-13 09:47

Seren's picture

I wish you'd have met him too hon he was truly the best man I ever knew; I am still struggling with my grief I also have to deal with everything that comes after his passing which was and has been incredibly difficult.

Thanks so much for compliment I am so happy you liked it my friend.

my love to you both OJ xox

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

author comment

Seren

Mon, 2023-02-13 13:23

Seren's picture

I am stoked you liked it so much thanks for your kind comment.

Kind regards Jayne

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

author comment

Poets Hand

Sat, 2023-02-11 17:26

Poets Hand's picture

Everyone of your poems is excellent. They are beautifully worded and ring of gentleness and compassion. The depth of your lyrics always amazes me. I wish I could write as well.
Poets Hand
Hannah

Seren

Mon, 2023-02-13 13:25

Seren's picture

You're way too kind thank you for that compliment its nice to know when I am doing it right and reaching people with my words.

Warm hugs Jayne x

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

author comment

Candlewitch

Sat, 2023-02-11 17:51

Candlewitch's picture
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how are you doing today? I've been a little worried about you, but your poem tells me to stop. I really loved this poem. these are my favorite lines:

Maybe as echos
through deserts vast,
or maybe a comet
that moseys on past

instead of (moseys) how about: shoots or propels, or explodes or another action word? this is only a suggestion.
*Love Sis

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

Seren

Mon, 2023-02-13 13:28

Seren's picture

I am so happy you liked this one. I wrote a few poems that night but this is one that wrote itself kind of.

I'm always really stoked when you like my poems.

With much love Always Lilbug

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

author comment

Lavender

Sat, 2023-02-11 19:33

Lavender's picture
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Hi, Jayne,
So moving. This beautiful poem affirms that you truly aren't separated in spirit - all those places you've mentioned, if feels as if you are already there. What a lovely vessel your poetry is to connect you with your father in this way.
L

Seren

Mon, 2023-02-13 13:32

Seren's picture

When I write these in a sense I am there. My poetry pivots from this to that in a heartbeat, it depends on the cycle of grief. It's helped me immensely in the grieving process

Thanks for your read and visit

Hugs Jayne

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

author comment

lovedly

Sun, 2023-02-12 04:55

lovedly's picture

So I will only request maintain yourself ...read my poem
GRIEF BE BRIEF
Will u search it or should I post it here.
But I have wiped off my tear

AS my time also does come near
SEREN Sis
OR
I need to post it for sis thee

Be thyself ....I LOST BOTH PARENTS OVER 50 YEARS AGO

WITHIN a year...
Time never slows moves on you and all know
now about your face bring about a glow

Seren

Mon, 2023-02-13 13:34

Seren's picture

I am so sorry you've been so long without your loved ones

Thanks so much for the read and the visit

Love Sis xxx

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

author comment

Rosewood Apothecary

Sun, 2023-02-12 14:16

Rosewood Apothecary's picture
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Gorgeous job. You’re certainly married to the cosmos and I for one am a fan.

Great writing as always
Tim

Seren

Mon, 2023-02-13 13:36

Seren's picture

I am a fan of your fabulous writings. That you like this is enough for me

Thanks for the visit and the encouraging comment.

Hugs Jayne xox

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

author comment
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