Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

I Heard That

I heard that
the end is nigh
all you need is love
the Russians are coming
and sneakers make your feet stink
blondes are stupid
Jussie dindunuffin
the Arc has been found
and Michelle Obama is a man
vegans are healthy
broccoli cures cancer
spinsters are fun
and plaid panted hipsters are as cool as they come
the earth is flat
craft beers are good
sluts make fine brides
and pedos are misunderstood
nazis are everywhere and the KKK
the SPLC is not biased
that's what I heard just today

( ain't the internet grand! )

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words: 
SPLC (southern poverty law center)
Editing stage: 

Comments

Its a zoo ..nice write!!
Z

yes, a zoo of many wonderful exhibits, but oh so many creepy crawlies to contend with.
But I have to admit, I'm kind of addicted (please don't judge this guilty pleasure)

thanks for the support

Al

author comment

to find here. I like the thoughts, it flowed well and I read and re-read it a few times just to make sure that I got it all. ~ Gee.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

thanks Gee

Al

author comment

my brain needs a bubblebath. Nice poem, combining the collage of crazy news.

I would really consider the ending...I knew something was coming, there were several possibilities until you say it at the end.

that's what I heard just today
( ain't the internet grand! )

I would redo those two lines as a couplet, rhymed perhaps for greater
effect. The whole poem becomes based in the sarcasm of the last line which can often finish a poem better as a couplet.

The only other aspect is the idea of "hearing" the internet...i think we see these headlines mostly as flash items, Google news and all that...we hear the radio or tv...or youtube, but that's not a headline resource. So might be what you "saw" today...

Eumolpus
I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing
than teach ten thousand stars how not to dance
ee cummings

I am a Youtube addict
I don't "watch" the talking heads
I listen and "hear" them
The lines in the the poem are my takeaways from whatever theme they were speaking of,
Not headlines.
But I can understand you making that assumption, and as written, the general audience may make that same observation as you did.

should I change it for that reason? maybe If this were to be published elsewhere (God forbid) I would...but for now I'll leave it alone

except for the ending... I really don't like it myself and will try to work it out as per your suggestion

thanks as always,

Al

author comment
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.