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You carry me each day

.

In a dream of night before me rose
I walked along an endless shore;
moist sand glowed a silvery pink,
danced to lights in the waning sun;
its length moving, curved around
dotted stars in the form of a heart.

I peered ahead and looked behind,
shifted my gaze from side to side;
waiting to catch a glimpse of you
and fall within your gaze as you
engaged my eyes in an embrace,
but only feel the sighing wind.

The soft sand crunched under me;
a powdery kiss upon my soles.
Still I searched, marching onward,
past the crest into a dimpled vale,
and realised that I was inside you,
clear waters surrounded your days.

I then began to shut my eyes to see
and focus upon the things we share;
pulling together joined memories,
realising you had taken me there
into the core of your daily chores--
carrying me through your world

.

Editing stage: 

Comments

true emotion and not a hint of sentimentality.

You have excelled yourself.

cheers,
Jess
Neopoet is a workshop. Poets take the time to read and think about your work and offer suggestions.
There is no obligation to make any changes however please acknowledge critique and comments.

That means so much to me, thanks for the succinct feedback. You are most appreciated.

__________________________________________________
'Break, break break on thy cold grey stones, O Sea.'

author comment

A lovely piece and as Jess said very well written, it was a joy to read.
A truth of belonging as a part of something not touchable but there to caress in thought, Yours Ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

Thank you, kindly, Ian. I am glad the Muse had allowed this "not touchable something" to be articulated in verse.

__________________________________________________
'Break, break break on thy cold grey stones, O Sea.'

author comment

simply marvelous poetry from you

.....and realised

that I was inside you

loved

I do try, you know :-)
Sometimes writing can be as easy as breathing
And there are moments it can be the most difficult thing to do.

__________________________________________________
'Break, break break on thy cold grey stones, O Sea.'

author comment
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