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You carry me each day

.

In a dream of night before me rose
I walked along an endless shore;
moist sand glowed a silvery pink,
danced to lights in the waning sun;
its length moving, curved around
dotted stars in the form of a heart.

I peered ahead and looked behind,
shifted my gaze from side to side;
waiting to catch a glimpse of you
and fall within your gaze as you
engaged my eyes in an embrace,
but only feel the sighing wind.

The soft sand crunched under me;
a powdery kiss upon my soles.
Still I searched, marching onward,
past the crest into a dimpled vale,
and realised that I was inside you,
clear waters surrounded your days.

I then began to shut my eyes to see
and focus upon the things we share;
pulling together joined memories,
realising you had taken me there
into the core of your daily chores--
carrying me through your world

.

Editing stage: 

Comments

true emotion and not a hint of sentimentality.

You have excelled yourself.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

That means so much to me, thanks for the succinct feedback. You are most appreciated.

__________________________________________________
'write on! let these words free.'

author comment

A lovely piece and as Jess said very well written, it was a joy to read.
A truth of belonging as a part of something not touchable but there to caress in thought, Yours Ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

Thank you, kindly, Ian. I am glad the Muse had allowed this "not touchable something" to be articulated in verse.

__________________________________________________
'write on! let these words free.'

author comment

simply marvelous poetry from you

.....and realised

that I was inside you

loved

I do try, you know :-)
Sometimes writing can be as easy as breathing
And there are moments it can be the most difficult thing to do.

__________________________________________________
'write on! let these words free.'

author comment
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