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lost in the ripples

Submitted by Seren on Sat, 2012-12-29 06:09

Mirrored mountains gleam
Ripples erase reflections
Water moves away

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 
Editing - rough draft

Comments

weirdelf

Sat, 2012-12-29 06:30

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with the most profound quality required of haiku
"Water moves away"
Brilliant!

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

Seren

Sun, 2012-12-30 01:52

Seren's picture

I appreciate it I've been writing lots of haiku I am exploring the boundaries

Cheers Jc xxx

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

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Rula

Sat, 2012-12-29 11:17

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Painted really well
lovely!!

❤❤❤❤❤❤

Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words
........Robert Frost☺

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Seren

Sun, 2012-12-30 01:53

Seren's picture

Very glad you like it

Regards Jc x

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

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Seren

Sun, 2012-12-30 01:56

Seren's picture

I really appreciate your comment ... I finished another today will post it later tonight

Love Jc xxx

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

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BlueDemon77

Sat, 2012-12-29 23:14

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Perfect image, placid, I can see, hear, smell, and feel it. Wonderful work!

Ron

Blue Demon77

"What I want is to be what I was before the knife,
before the brooch pin, before the salve, fixed me in this parenthesis:
Horses fluent in the wind. A place, a time gone out of mind."

The Eye Mote-Sylvia Plath

Seren

Sun, 2012-12-30 02:01

Seren's picture

Thank you so much I've been working hard on the series there are many more just not ready for posting
Thanks for the great comment makes it all worthwhile

Regards Jc xxx

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

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Ian.T

Sun, 2012-12-30 03:56

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A good Haiku now here is one for you:-

Serendipity (happy accident (;-)
when all our poets dreams come true
They should write it down

Have a lovely day hey, Yours Ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

Seren

Sun, 2012-12-30 04:35

Seren's picture

And the answer to your haiku will be my next post in half an hour lol

Glad you liked it

Love always Jc xxx

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

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scribbler

Sun, 2012-12-30 19:06

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Dang! Now you've got Me thinking about Haiku and I never can write just one lol. I liked the way you pointed out the delicacy of reflections on water..............stan

Seren

Fri, 2013-01-04 08:22

Seren's picture

Really glad you enjoyed my little haiku ... I've been bothered by the Muse of late lol
Look forward to reading a haiku from you !!

Love Jc xxx

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

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weirdelf

Fri, 2013-01-04 08:34

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remember my "Haikookas"?
You can write haikus in a series, but the condition is each one must be able to stand alone.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

sueb

Mon, 2012-12-31 05:58

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gorgeous

Seren

Fri, 2013-01-04 08:23

Seren's picture

Thanks Sue glad you liked it

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

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