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Bottom Line [Trochee]...

A way IS the PATH that YOU take FROM me
I wish THAT it WAS back THIS way YOU see
FOR if I was IN love WITH you, YOU know
I could NOT bear TO see YOU go, YOU know?

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Last few words: 
Did I get the gist of Trochee?
Editing stage: 
Workshop: 

Comments

I had trouble with this but think it came out ok in the end. Have you tried dactyl

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

a way/ is the path/ that you take/ from me [2 anapests in this line]
i wish/ that it/ was back/ this way/ you see
for if/  i was/ in love/ with you/, you know
i could/ not bear/ to see/  you go/, you know?

mostly iambic

cheers,
Jess
Neopoet Directors

but Jess is right. This isn't even close. I am suggesting to everyone that when you read it to yourself you "punch" the first syllable and then every other one forcing the rhythm. The funny sounding speech you hear is "non Trochee".

W. H. Snow

A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley

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