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AP by BlueDemon77

http://vocaroo.com/i/s1fVmHdaS3tN

AP by Ron Woodruff (BlueDemon77)

You the kind, my muse in the past

Never have minds and bodies worked

with such little effort

a day I know, and grabbing

the power and the scrotum

I knew it would be the end

......but I am powerful

You have been so gracious

took responsibility yet

always knew that an

impardonable sin had been shouted

You hugged me and kissed me, knowing

and you did't want me away, maybe what we had

was truly rare. You message me, ask me questions

I show a brave face, one not scarred by

the sandblaster that shredded me.

I stay and hear how much you miss me....like razors

You are so kind I feel weak.

Your voice, your image, make me want to start again...

but I am a man and I deserve to pay for my wrongs.

Ron

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage: 

Comments

I want to give this a very different reading.
http://vocaroo.com/i/s1lTgskhYkJC
Big difference hey?

I'm getting a blast from the vocaroo bit.

Dig the poem. When self-flagellation is not enough, ask a woman who has fallen out of love with you.

cheers,
Jess
Neopoet Directors

I enjoyed your reading. You gave it a lot less of the 'poor me' tone. my lack of objectivity poured in there.

Good read!

Ron
BlueDemon77

Blue Demon77

"What I want is to be what I was before the knife,
before the brooch pin, before the salve, fixed me in this parenthesis:
Horses fluent in the wind. A place, a time gone out of mind."

The Eye Mote-Sylvia Plath

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