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"A Journey..."*
from the...
Water
Of
My
Birth
to the...
Ground where my
Remains lie an
An extinguished
Vessel decomposing under
Earth
Style / type:
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity):
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Review Request (Direction):
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
[This option has been removed]
Last few words:
*Acrostic Now read the by verses along with the capital letters going down
Editing stage:
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Comments
IKnowNoBox
Tue, 2011-09-06 14:14
Thank you.
David
IKnowNoBox
Sat, 2011-09-10 19:22
Thank you
In ink,
David
raj
Sat, 2011-09-10 15:48
Hi David
great imagination in coming up with an acrostic on womb to grave...
raj (sublime_ocean)
IKnowNoBox
Sat, 2011-09-10 19:23
Thank you,
In ink,
David
Ian.T
Sat, 2012-10-06 18:51
David
an excellent write that conforms to the acrostic art, I hope that you have looked up the A-Z of poetry as there are many varieties of acrostics that are fun to do,
Yours Ian.T
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
scribbler
Mon, 2014-07-21 22:32
hi
The rules for acrostic are a bit stretched but the spirit remains............stan
IKnowNoBox
Wed, 2014-07-23 18:29
I have others
that I will be posted in time. Thanks for reviewing.
In ink
David
jane210660
Mon, 2016-06-06 07:14
Clever
I thought this was rather clever BEFORE I realised it was an acrostic - yeas a bit slow, but I hadn't had my morning coffee :-). I was really impressed when I woke up and saw the full thing. Jx
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Don't forget to offer critique on poems you read.
IKnowNoBox
Mon, 2016-06-06 13:54
Thank you.
It took me some time to polish it with the use of Birth in place of Beginning.
jane210660
Mon, 2016-06-06 15:23
Well, it's all the better for
Well, it's all the better for the polishing then. Jx
------------
Remember we are a workshop site.
Don't forget to offer critique on poems you read.