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Mayday!

.
camera mounted tripod
relegated to leaning in the corner
otherwise, unused

accursed vacuum cleaner
covered in the dust
of eternal stillness

printer on the fritz
don't care
purpose has become tiresome

my chair, however,
used and used, so used
conforming me
into a marbled headed quasi statue
stiff
ossified
immobilized
but for the gentle
jostling of a mouse

...while fresh, beckoning sunbeams
peer through smokey windows

Editing stage: 

Comments

You must be able to see my room there can be no other answer. I understand this completely as i am it. No seriously that is so close it's uncanny, an astute piece of writing. But also well written Regards Roscoe..

Roscoe Llane,

Religion will rip your faith off, and return
for the mask of disbelief that's left.

I know this is another very late reply...my bad! All I can say is that I too am 66, might that have any bearing on our
similar style of living these days!

thanks for the visit

Al

author comment

I love the imagery. As a photographer and poet, I can relate. (typ0)I think that is an extra c in vacuum.

vexations

thank you for the compliment, and the pointing out the spelling typo

Al

author comment

The camera is the seeing eye and
the stillness,
the frozen image it records
of this interior, so well described,
we see the whole perfectly.

Love Ann of Norway.

"The image of yourself which you see in a mirror Is dead,
but the reflection of the moon on water, lives." Kenzan.

you write so beautifully of other poets work...your.generousity and gentleness is very much appreciated

sincerely

Al

author comment

loved the imagery in this ... only one word I
would question the use of, "ancient" ... I was
thinking this could be something different, more
flavorful ... or not, just thought I'd mention it.

enjoyed the read

Richard

thanks for the input ...your point about "ancient" was valid....I think "smokey" works better

I havn't been commenting much of late (not that I ever did) . Just to let you know, I've liked all your postings
wish you would do more . there is always somthing refresingly poignant about them

sincerely

Al

author comment

through poetry! I think you have captured the image of the scene perfectly. Maybe instead of [ancient] you could use decrepit? ~ Gee

Comments and critique are vital to this site!
Even if you just say: I liked this story or your spelling
of a word is wrong, take the time to write a line or two
and comment. Your fellow poets will thank you!
.

I am flattered. You are a whizz at scene capturing yourself....so thank you. Sorry about the late reply. And thanks for offering an alternative choice of a word....I've edited using "smokey windows"

Al

author comment

You do paint a wonderfully clear picture.
Everything else is still and covered in dust or just falling apart with age and disuse, except for this guy in his trusty chair, staring at a computer screen, hand on mouse...
For some reason, though, I see this whole scene in black & white. Not sure why...
Psyve

thank you for your feedback...as I reread this piece, I can almost equate a dryness in the rhetorical style with black and white, can't really explain it either....almost as if I inteneded it to be "incolor", but it came out printed in black and white
as opossed to being envisioned in balck and white to begin with!

I don't think that explanation clears things up a bit...but I can live with the wonder of it all.

Al

author comment
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