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YEAR OF THE LOCUST

Submitted by Sheddie on Sun, 2023-10-08 07:06

The year of the locust yells loudly
Throwing time into grief,
Dancing nightmares, beclouding rickety,
It's the era of torture, where nothing alive weakens,
Mercies fallen into cracked holes, drowning in the sea of misery,
Close the lines, aye, strengthen the fortress,
The times are fast upon us, choking our reign,
It's the year of havoc, that year of the locust.

The year of the locust yells loudly,
Striking its sharp claws into our sorry faces,
Treachery jaws, piercing parasite,
Lo they come, agents of manipulation, molestation,
They dance on our rotund crops, eating fat the good of the land,
Mass infestation, swarming on the juicy bunch of nature,
No one to care, no one to go to care.
It's the year of havoc, that year of the locust.

The year of the locust yells loudly,
Sending droplets of blood into our pain,
When the harvests are come of age, succulent, lush.
May the evil ease our dispirited spirits,
May our joy come at dawn,
When everything passes, that year of the locust

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neopoet

Sun, 2023-10-08 13:10

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The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

The poem "Year of the Locust" effectively conveys a sense of despair and destruction through its vivid imagery and strong language. The repetition of the phrase "year of the locust" emphasizes the central theme and creates a sense of urgency and chaos. The poem also effectively uses personification to give the locusts a menacing presence and to highlight their destructive impact on the land and its inhabitants.

One suggestion for improvement would be to provide more specific details or examples to further enhance the reader's understanding of the devastation caused by the locusts. For example, you could describe the specific crops that are being destroyed or the impact on the local community. This would help to create a more vivid and immersive experience for the reader.

Additionally, consider varying the sentence structure and rhythm throughout the poem. While the repetition of certain phrases can be effective, it is also important to maintain a sense of variety and flow. Experiment with different sentence lengths and structures to create a more dynamic and engaging reading experience.

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Lavender

Sun, 2023-10-08 14:07

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Hello, Sheddie,
You have described the dislike for and the destruction caused by the locust very well. I'm not certain what "where nothing alive weakens" means, but your other images of devastation are very visual and strong.
I'd state the line "When the harvests are come of age..." to either "When the harvests have come of age..." or "When the harvests are of age..."
If the locust have affected you in this way, I hope you recover!
L

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