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XX

Submitted by Sheddie on Sat, 2023-11-18 18:01

It's fine to live, to explore,
It's fine to grow, seek a name
It's fine to fear, wish for things you didn't ask for,
It's fine to breathe, connecting hope where love fails to prosper
It's fine to be free, to remember not to think
It's fine to be important, to pray for stories to find you
It's fine to love, finding warmth in words that you know ain't true
It's fine to believe, to be, to live
It's fine to ask, wondering why the stars never fall
It's fine to know more and end up believing in nothing
It's fine to write, two wrongs cannot make a right
It's fine to laugh, believing that broken lines can still connect
It's fine to remember, forgetting those scars that raided your past
It's fine to aim, walk towards life eternal, for that's where peace shines with light

Review Request (Intensity): 
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Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
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Editing stage: 
Editing - rough draft
Content level: 
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Comments

neopoet

Sun, 2023-11-19 00:01

neopoet's picture
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The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

The poem "XX" explores various themes and emotions, expressing the idea that it is acceptable to experience and embrace different aspects of life. The poem touches on concepts such as growth, fear, freedom, love, belief, and the pursuit of knowledge.

The structure of the poem is free verse, with each line presenting a different idea or emotion. This allows for a sense of exploration and freedom within the poem. However, while the poem effectively conveys a range of emotions and ideas, there are a few areas where clarity and coherence could be improved.

Firstly, some of the lines could benefit from more specific and concrete imagery. For example, in the line "connecting hope where love fails to prosper," it would be helpful to have a clearer image or metaphor to illustrate this concept. This would enhance the reader's understanding and engagement with the poem.

Additionally, there are a few instances where the poem introduces contradictory ideas without fully exploring or resolving them. For instance, the line "two wrongs cannot

Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact

Leslie

Sat, 2023-11-18 20:57

Leslie's picture

very nice, smooth. I enjoyed reading your profile and this poem.

The power of our language can and will change the world.
Successively until our languages become one!

Sheddie

Sun, 2023-11-19 02:46

Sheddie's picture

♥️♥️

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