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The Scapegoat in the Mirror

The being that is you, inside

is finally just getting, here;

the one you need
to blame is greed

not, this scapegoat in the mirror.

This shadow of your more, pensive self

allows the both of you, to have a beer;

but, too much malt
will have you both, blame, fault

on an innocent, scapegoat in the mirror.

Neither one of you, will ever learn

for reasons still, unclear;

as far as I can see
you took the wrong, journey;

when you chose, to blame that scapegoat, in the mirror.

From all of the mental junkfood

to everything that you hold, dear;

don't get too, proud
you're not at all, allowed;

your dues were paid by this scapegoat, in the mirror.

You need to gain some principals

to which you can easily, adhere;

then every version of you
can join this, elite club, too;

by being forgiven by that scapegoat, in the mirror !

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
How was my language use?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Last few words: 
I re-worked this little ditty, 'til rather late. Was trying to make the lmost invisible "point" that, there usually will come a time when, we've got to...."break down"...and finally, forgive ourselves. soo....I, digress; doc.
Editing stage: 

Comments

...is ths any better?
doc.

Neopoet is "newtriffic" !
...from the heart, or a reasonable faxcimile;
david a. goodwin #{:>{)} @==

author comment

too much space, cedillas, decoration and commas.

However the message is strong. Accountability and self-forgiveness. Truly valuable concepts.

cheers,
Jess
Neopoet is a workshop. Poets take the time to read and think about your work and offer suggestions.
There is no obligation to make any changes however please acknowledge critique and comments.

...have I helped, or made it, worse?
doc.

Neopoet is "newtriffic" !
...from the heart, or a reasonable faxcimile;
david a. goodwin #{:>{)} @==

author comment

Maybe I should stop hassling you about the excessive commas, they seem to work for you, but I just can't see why. Perhaps my failing.

cheers,
Jess
Neopoet is a workshop. Poets take the time to read and think about your work and offer suggestions.
There is no obligation to make any changes however please acknowledge critique and comments.

narcsism
and the new digital cameras
we create now

when before we searched

this is a good poem for taking
a second look
at the real reflection we are
throwing in the view

not just our perceptions we are
seeing

I remember van gogh and his
mental condition
the many images he painted of
himself undoubtedly via mirror

external via internal

like living a myth
its just a reflection
an echo given out

Thank You

But most often we look to blame others not ourselves. It may help if we blame a mirror image

"Kurt" Blamed the society that created him..
The Horror The horror the horror
but first he did blame others too

its just easier I guess and automatic function of our reptilian
brain...

interesting thought....
I must ask myself when I see my reflection again...

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