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Regeneration...

Sprinkles of sparkling diamonds
Tossed from the tops of blue waves
Sun drenched skin of brown

My happy place
Refuge from the cold world
I shut the door

Batten the hatches...
The phone is off the hook
The door-bell doesn't work

Your voice is but a murmur
Distant seagulls drown you out
The breeze says no one's home

Wet sand at the edge of the world
Cool drink of sweet aloneness
Drunk from frosted glass

The door rattles from ebb of tide
The wreckage of life
Is swept away

Treasures will be salvaged
From the briny deep
Then I can go home...

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 

Comments

The ending confuses me slightly, but the imagery of the refuge is keen.
Oh and "murmur" is spelled with two "m's" and no "e".

The Grammar Cop strikes again!
I derive entirely too much pleasure out of doing that.
wesley

W. H. Snow

A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley

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Methinks Sir Wesley that you'd love a dual of swords
I am a fencer trained, but now depleted to that end
'en garde' I Ieap to defend my knight Sir gee,
but in the end must acquiesce, agree.

I love your swash-buckle style of comment.

Nordic cloud.

"The image of yourself which you see in a mirror Is dead,
but the reflection of the moon on water, lives." Kenzan.

my Queen, but I will accept my lumps. I didn't sharpen my mind before sallying forth to battle.~ Sir Gee

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author comment

catching that [murmmer], just a dumb mistake from a well sedated mind. I should refrain from posting until the next day, I suppose. As to the ending, I was trying to give the sense of being refreshed from a trip to my refuge. I guess maybe I should give the ending a little more thought. Thanks for the read and critique. ~ Gee

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i need to find this place Gee! what do you think, google maps? :p i loved it.
always,
mag

means a way of looking at things, I would guess that you can find a happy place just like this one. I don't think you can google it. Just take the road least traveled for a little bit, turn left or right and go straight for as long as it takes to get out of sight. Then sit down and think about what makes you feel good. Thanks for the read and comment. ~ Gee

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that [aloneness] is a word either, but we poets are allowed to make up words that everyone understands. I'm sure that everyone understood the meaning behind it. I didn't use "loneliness,because that wasn't what I meant. I was celebrating my being alone. I guess solitude would have sufficed, but I thought that "aloneness" did a better job. Thanks for the read and critique ~ Gee

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Hey G, I'm back! Great to read you again! Some lovely imagery here, with a twist of bitterness & a warm close that was a surprise... Always feels nice when you can finish setting up the conflict & tension & turn away from it finally to a better place huh? Then I can go home... like it.

Hope all is well my friend

Take care
Anni

Cheers
Anni

My dear friend always told me "Water the seeds of joy first"

I am very glad to see you again! I am so glad you liked this one. i was just trying to get my head on straight after a really trying day. So I went to my happy place. After some contemplation, I was ready to take the treasure that I found there and go home refreshed. ~ Gee

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author comment

& there-in lies another poem right there!

So great o "see" you.

A

Cheers
Anni

My dear friend always told me "Water the seeds of joy first"

and comment. Always feel free to take inspiration from any of my work. I love it when someone says; Hey that gives me an idea for a poem. ~ Gee

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I think you must have a most wonderful painting of a wave inside your house,
inside your mind, even if you find yourself alone and battened in.
Our imagination is taxed as we hear our way through your poem
happy that you enjoyed it.
The treasures from a beach are wonderful.

"Wet sand at the edge of the world
Cool drink of sweet aloneness
Drunk from frosted glass"

this alone is fascinating.

Queen Nordic cloud.

"The image of yourself which you see in a mirror Is dead,
but the reflection of the moon on water, lives." Kenzan.

in my house, but I have a friend who does. A marvelous painting of a huge sparkling wave against a sky of azure blue and in the forefront, a beach of white sand with graceful palms. It is by a local artist who spends his winters in Porto Rico. He says the waves aren't really that big, unless you lie facing them on your stomach. As Emogirl says: It's a matter of perspective! Love to my Queen, ~ Sir Gee

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I think you must have a most wonderful painting of a wave inside your house,
inside your mind, even if you find yourself alone and battened in.
Our imagination is taxed as we hear our way through your poem
happy that you enjoyed it.
The treasures from a beach are wonderful.

"Wet sand at the edge of the world
Cool drink of sweet aloneness
Drunk from frosted glass"

this alone is fascinating.

Queen Nordic cloud.

"The image of yourself which you see in a mirror Is dead,
but the reflection of the moon on water, lives." Kenzan.

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