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Promises

He promised me ecstasy
I got sausage and chips
He promised me kisses twee
too short on my lips
He got down on one knee
couldn't get up with his hips
he promised me he was free
my ear his girl clips

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing stage: 

Comments

Hi,

Quite enjoyed the humour in lines 1-6. Line 7 was the denouement...but I just don't get like 8!...LOL

'Betty'

Hi,

Quite enjoyed the humour in lines 1-6. Line 7 was the denouement...but I just don't get like 8!...LOL

'Betty'

Hi Betty glad u enjoyed the humour in this little one x

author comment

She abused my, as if I made them do it!
She said "I expected sushi and got hamburger"

Sex is stupid. Unless it is very very good.

I loved this poem and look forward to more of yours.

cheers,
Jess
Neopoet Managing Directors, with Richard (themoonman)

Hi thanks so much glad u liked this little one all the best x

author comment
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