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PRAYERS

Submitted by Sheddie on Wed, 2023-09-20 19:13

In the quiet of the night, we pray,
Underneath the moon's soft, silver ray.
Guide us through darkness, show the way,
In your loving arms, we wish to stay.

Grant us strength, courage, and grace,
To walk through life's ever-changing pace.
May we find joy in each new day's face,
And in your embrace, we find our place.

Bless our hearts with love and care,
For all the burdens we must bear.
In our moments of doubts, fear and despair,
Let your presence reassure and repair.

As we journey through this life's unknown,
With seeds of hope, let our hearts be sown.
In our prayers, may your love be shown,
A guiding light until we're finally home.

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Comments

neopoet

Thu, 2023-09-21 01:13

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The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

The poem "Prayers" beautifully captures the theme of seeking guidance, strength, and love through prayer. The imagery of the quiet night and the moon's soft, silver ray creates a serene and contemplative atmosphere. The repetition of the word "pray" in the first line emphasizes the central theme of the poem.

The poem flows smoothly with a consistent rhyme scheme and rhythm. The use of end rhymes in each stanza contributes to the overall musicality of the poem. The language is simple and accessible, allowing the reader to easily connect with the emotions conveyed.

One suggestion for improvement would be to consider varying the structure and length of the stanzas. Currently, each stanza consists of four lines, which creates a predictable pattern. Experimenting with different stanza lengths or incorporating enjambment could add a sense of surprise and keep the reader engaged.

Additionally, while the poem effectively expresses the desire for guidance and strength, it would benefit from more specific and vivid imagery to enhance the emotional impact. For

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Geezer

Wed, 2023-09-20 21:51

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I am not so keen on every line rhyme. It is very hard to do and make it work without sounding forced. You have managed it.
I felt that the pace seemed very quick for a poem about something so [almost] religious. There are some lines that are longer than others and it makes it sound a little ragged. For instance: "Guide us through darkness, show us the way", is only eight syllables while the other three are nine. The second stanza has seven beats for the first line and the rest have nine.
The third has seven, eight, nine and ten, and the last one has nine, nine, eight and eleven! It is not enough to rhyme, and do it so that it makes sense, you must be able to read it with a sense of rhythm. ~ Geezer.
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