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poor those sullen minds

I thought poor … like pee
of those sullen minds

till I met and read ye
you held my hand….
many try to kill…
and upon others soil till …

that is the way with this wicked world…
we all know…
how the real ones perish…
whilst others glow…
and so it's time to surface here ..
and form a tracer… like a bullet...
and so may it be the violet...

I held to my feet
dug deep ...
as I learnt then
when we did meet

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 


Sullen mind, wicked ones is causing much sorrows in the earth.
Deep and heartfelt. With all this never ending trail upon people sullen anyone's thinking.
I'm tired so I hope I get it.

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

I very much appreciate


author comment

There are some really good lines in this one I would love to see it tightened up with an edit. By the way I noticed in one of your comments to me you asked about an edit, was that recent or from some time ago? you will have to remind me.

I liked the content of this one you can really turn out some surprising writes sometimes :)

love JC xxx

p.s. I think this one could do with a better title that one just doesn't do it for me

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

in the meantime
please edit this
as I locate the recent comment of yours
on the other one..
which I will have to revisit


author comment

and Who is God


author comment
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