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in a pocketful of dreams
around her finger lies a rainbow's vow
that promised her a silvery-golden moon
still, after all the years spent, even now
around her finger lies a rainbow's vow
bestowed by one in history kept, somehow
within a telegram's curt words of doom
around her finger lies a rainbow's vow
that promised her a silvery-golden moon
and cherished in a pocketful of dreams
are golden traces back, with silver threads
the amber, for remembered loves it gleams
all cherished in a pocketful of dreams
and pearly strands with spirit stream moonbeams
to shimmer brightly over past foot-treads
all cherished in a pocketful of dreams
are golden traces back, with silver threads
.
Style / type:
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words:
triolets
Editing stage:
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Region & Country
Western Australia
Favorite Poets
Favourite poets? So many, so varied. I like particular songs, not necessarily the singer... and the same goes for poetry. I can honestly say though, that Alfred Noyes' The Highwayman was what inspired my love of poetry - my mother began reading it to me when I was still a baby, and it became my favourite bedtime story
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Comments
Ian.T
Sun, 2012-12-16 18:51
Judy
Beautiful words, the sequence lost me though, was there a purpose to the changes you made of the repetition??
The message of the word of loss, was plain to see, Yours Ian.T
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
judyanne
Sun, 2012-12-16 22:13
thanks ian
i'm not sure where you think i have made changes to the repetition - except for the words 'and' and 'all' being interchanged in the repeating line in the second stanza - and that was merely an attempt to join the thoughts of the two stanzas
thank again
love judy
xxx
'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)
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