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Old Mother Hubbard - 2013

Old mother Hubbard
she went to the cupboard
to give the poor dog a bone.
But when she got there
the cupboard was bare,
a thing that she’d never known.

She went to the Doc,
in deep horror and shock,
the doc, he gave her a pill.
She swallowed it whole
then choked in a bowl,
footing an N.H.S bill.

She did what she ort,
some money she sort’
begging the bank for a loan.
They said “with regret
you’re not a safe bet”.
She didn’t much like their tone.

She asked provident,
at five hundred percent
if they would lend her some cash.
Well they said “of course,
you’re loan we’ll endorse”…
Boosting her monetary stash.

Old mother Hubbard
she stocked up her cupboard
much to the dog’s great relief.
Soon it discovered
she’d filled her cupboard
with burgers made of horse beef.

She was feeling well,
‘til her countenance fell
now she was feeling forlorn.
Her statement now said
She’d gone in the red,
due to a pound overdrawn.

She made a swift call,
to a manager tall,
telling him she was depressed.
He said her account
was docked that amount
following compound interest.

When all else failed,
she asked to be bailed,
sadly “he had to refrain”.
He heard her beseech
when laid on a beach,
drinking a glass of champagne.

Her credit had crashed
so he said unabashed,
with a voice smarmy and swank.
“The sum that you owe
will flourish and grow
unless you pay off the bank”! ( [email protected]. )

Feeling quite queer
she trembled with fear,
stressed by the worry induced.
She owned not a thing,
not even a ring
and lived on Tesco reduced.

She sat in the cold;
arthritic and old
eating her “out of date” snacks.
To make matters worse
a councilor, terse,
told of a new bedroom tax.

Her state was contrived
when a letter arrived,
speaking of benefit cuts.
What irked her the most,
was settlements grossed
my men who sit on their butts.

Poor mother Hubbard,
her health waned and suffered,
and her dog was underfed.
They died in the gloom
and so I assume,
huddled together in bed.

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 


Would be a lot funnier if it wasn't quite so close to the truth lol. I think the gov't will next want to tax the air we expell and call it a carbon tax...............stan

And micro-chip our brains at birth - if they're not already do it. Nice to see you Stan! I hope all is well with you and yours. ( I forgot to add the last two verses) Lol

Love Mand xxxxx

author comment

New goverment tax in 2014:-
£1-30 per litre of oxygen
£6-50 per litre of nitrogen for mixing.
This will be the going rate for recycled fresh air.
Yours Ian.T

There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

I think digit should be on the case. Perhaps the houses of parliment would be a good venue! Lol There are a number of soiled digits there to collect. I thought of digit when I passed through Bristol on the train. He he

Thanks for reading and commenting!

Love Mand xxxxxx

author comment

Hope you didn't go to London yesterday, Digit say's those stupid people think that the body on the table is a dummy, just wait a few days in this hot weather lol.
Yours Ian.T

There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

No I am safe and sound in Wales - let me know when digit is due to arrive! I hear digit is going to the wax works in London ( a truly genius place to go ). I will be reading no 4 in the not to distant future.

Seeee you sooon.

LOve Mand xxxxxxx

author comment

If you are only on No 4 then you are OK as Digit is in London on No7 and that was only yesterday,
Mind you he needs two thumbs now so maybe a Welsh thumb would do?
Take care though he may be near I shall have to have words with him LOL.
He just smiles and asked where you live, can't think why lol.
That's better he has gone for a while
Yours as always Ian.T He He

There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

He could visit the Doctor Who studios in Cardiff!! and help the Daleks! Then take one of Doc Who's thumbs. He he. I'm not telling where I live, though I'm sure he has ways and means of finding out. He he

author comment
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