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NAKED Trees (November Contest)

Why do you choose to take that form?
Oh you this beautiful thing!
What you seed, are beautiful and attractive.

But we humans are disrespectful.
Only if you could cover them!
But you choose to uncover them

You not greedy like the humans
What a unique being you are!
Why that form, I ask again?
Or maybe you choose to disguise like that
You really don’t look NAKED to me.

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
Editing stage: 

Comments

"You really don’t look NAKED to me."

— this final line makes me envision the coats of matter worn by trees, shells of earth and decaying bark and the years upon years registered in rings — the coats that shelter the universal energy that holds everything. Or if you will, the quantum secrets that make up reality, the mystery we cannot understand. Thus, even the autumn trees shedding their leaves do not seem to divest of their shells, because there is still a secret, but forever left untold.

 

Love,
Steph

... to remember what it felt like to have my being set alight
beneath the moon when I was full and I was dancing with the night
when I could see beyond my sight
when I could see beyond my sight

yeah! the secret the trees choose to keep to their self

A kubolor never gets tired

author comment

but only trees have yearly rings
ours we give to our
lovely lovings

Why take that form? It has always amazed me how the random growth of twigs and limbs still co-ordinates to make a thing of beauty. Good luck in contest and please put (November contest} next to tile to make it easier for monthly judge to spot.......stan

ok. thanks alot

A kubolor never gets tired

author comment
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