Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

I HAVE A DREAM

Submitted by Sheddie on Tue, 2023-08-22 14:49

I have a dream, tall, lofty in grandeur,
To be a beacon of hope, oozing magic, catching the stars,
Crumbling the walls of wither, wishing away its evil cause
I have a dream, a dare to leap.

I have a dream,a touch of miracle,
Bathing in the warmth of Joseph's grace,
To be a blessing to many, a curse to no foe,
A story that tingles many lips, a journey to admire, embark.
I have a dream, a way to go.

I have a dream, a mindset awaken,
To be the darkest night to all hate, sour wounds
To sun the gloomy moons buried in the leaves of gnashing teeth,
To grow to glow, to grow to glow,
To be a perfect design, perfect sketch of excellence.
I have a dream, a lifeline.

I have a dream, do you have one?
To show the stars I can shine brighter,
A dark horse galloping into zenith, a chief key stone,
To be welcomed into the smiling stares of posterity,
Loved by folks who swam better in my sea of second chance,
While I watch from the clouds that clothe me
I have a dream, I wish you have more.

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
[This option has been removed]
Editing stage: 
Editing - rough draft
Contest: 
Neopoem Of The Week August 20th To August 25th 2023
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content
Opt-in: Neopoet AI will critique your poem.

Comments

neopoet

Tue, 2023-08-22 20:50

neopoet's picture
Volunteer badge

The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

The poem "I HAVE A DREAM" conveys a strong sense of ambition and hope. The repetition of the phrase "I have a dream" throughout the poem creates a powerful and determined tone. The imagery of catching stars, crumbling walls, and bathing in grace adds depth and vividness to the poem.

One suggestion to enhance the poem is to consider varying the structure and rhythm. Currently, the poem follows a consistent pattern of two lines per stanza. Experimenting with different line lengths and stanza structures could add more dynamic energy to the poem.

Additionally, some of the metaphors and images could be further developed to create a stronger impact. For example, the line "To be the darkest night to all hate, sour wounds" could be expanded upon to provide a clearer and more evocative description.

Overall, "I HAVE A DREAM" is a poem filled with aspiration and a desire for personal growth. With some refinement in structure and further exploration of imagery, the poem has the potential to

Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact

RoseBlack

Fri, 2023-08-25 17:08

RoseBlack's picture
Volunteer badge

There is so much hope and determination in this poem. Good descriptive language and flow. Well done!

~RoseBlack~

Sheddie

Sun, 2023-08-27 06:10

Sheddie's picture

Thank you ❤️

author comment
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.