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OF THE SENSES

Submitted by t. reflexion on Fri, 2011-08-05 20:03

Some eyes grow dim with age
And so with what they perceive
Analyze carefully what you see
Deception lurks around with illusion

The nose is nuptial to smell
Polygamous in types and kinds
Nasal hairs filter, smell selected
Confused with taste at times

The tongue takes a lick with a tang
Between the bitter and the sweet
A taste measured by its worth
Safety sew up, in time of need

Without the ear, sound is nothing
It calls the creatures to balance
Believe not all you hear from men
Some people speak in opposites

Touch not, that which is extreme
Between the hot and the cold
Comfort zones lie in the middle
And such is the way with life

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage: 
Editing - rough draft

Comments

Candlewitch

Tue, 2011-12-27 14:52

Candlewitch's picture
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Good title and subject matter! I enjoyed these lines:

Without the ear, sound is nothing
It calls the creatures to balance
Believe not all you hear from men
Some people speak in opposites

always, Cat

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t. reflexion

Wed, 2011-12-28 20:31

t. reflexion's picture

and best wishes

A rekindled faith - Dancing in the Light

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