Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.
why now
thought I'd moved forward
left all the yesterdays
where they belong
but unfinished business
called today and threw me back
into a whirlpool of emotions
can I close those doors
where eddies full of anger
spin constant
shut out hands of pain
that twist a heart
til it can sob no more
perhaps tomorrow will bring
clarity to a mind that now
suffocates in a mire of regret
a mire -
full of words unspoken
Style / type:
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity):
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Review Request (Direction):
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
[This option has been removed]
Editing stage:
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.
Comments
Eduardo Cruz
Tue, 2011-04-19 00:12
Juls
This is the best yet!
Full of good emotions and clear in it's direction
Bravo Carisima!
You used my name in this, but i am an eddy of comfort and love. Hahaha!
just kidding!
Eddie C.
LIFE ISN'T ABOUT WAITING FOR THE STORM TO PASS
IT'S ABOUT LEARNING HOW TO DANCE IN THE RAIN.
VIVIAN GREENE
49reasons
Tue, 2011-04-19 01:52
Eddie
thanks for reading....
lol @ your eddy reference
~Juls~
"While I'm writing, I'm far away;
and when I come back, I've gone."
— Pablo Neruda
CCfire
Tue, 2011-04-19 02:27
I like it still, so no crits
I like it still, so no crits from me. :) LOL@Eddie too
Chez
"The perfect woman perpetrates literature as she does a small sin: as an experiment, in passing, to see if anybody notices it - and to makes sure that somebody does." - Nietzsche
CCfire
Tue, 2011-04-19 02:27
I like it still, so no crits
I like it still, so no crits from me. :) LOL@Eddie too
Chez
"The perfect woman perpetrates literature as she does a small sin: as an experiment, in passing, to see if anybody notices it - and to makes sure that somebody does." - Nietzsche
lou
Tue, 2011-04-19 05:58
Hi
I enjoyed this poem, especially liked the second stanza
lou
Stand tall, be proud to be who you are, give the world the finger!!!!