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SunKu 9

Submitted by Barbara Writes on Tue, 2018-02-20 12:56

Blue skies
dark as night
jazz on my mind

can’t shake
disconnected
lingers inside

no gift
to sing jazz
I write the blues

Editing stage: 
Editing - rough draft

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raj

Tue, 2018-02-20 13:25

Good one Barbara

raj (sublime_ocean)

Barbara Writes

Tue, 2018-02-20 15:11

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I’m getting there

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

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IRiz

Tue, 2018-02-20 15:11

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I relate to your poem very much

IRiz

Barbara Writes

Tue, 2018-02-20 16:18

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Thanks for reading

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

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Sparrow

Tue, 2018-02-20 18:29

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Once again you have captured the Sunku way of writing.
Loved the music as it echoed around.
Yours Ian.x

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Unconditional love to you all.
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Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

Barbara Writes

Wed, 2018-02-21 08:21

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I trying to get. Just hope the way sticks in me. Lol I’ll forget when I start to write because I write from inspiration and spontaneity often. I’m reading and writing a lot so I can master the SunKu way without having to think about the way.

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

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raj

Wed, 2018-02-21 10:38

Hi Barbara,

If I may suggest, since it seems that you prefer not to give a title to the Sunku, you may suffix it with a number or date as you may find befitting. Even if not, consider this as just a friendly suggestion and let it pass.

It is such a good experience reading your posts. Please keep posting. I read all of them.

Hugs and regards...

raj (sublime_ocean)

Barbara Writes

Wed, 2018-02-21 11:44

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For suggestions I’ll number them

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

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