Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

Only One Gift

If you could give only one thing?

Most people would say they choose love.

Love is like a day in spring,

when the birds soar high up above,


from the south to the north fly,

also waking from sleep creation,

telling the winter's cold good bye,

and the earth starts resurrection.


If love was the chosen one

this simple gift how would you give?

Would there be attached conditions,

with self serving motives,


or could you give it freely,

not expecting a reward?

Would that be hard or easy,

needs to be considered before.


Some would choose to give money,

thinking that would solve some needs.

I think this thought is funny

their character can be seen.


Not that this is a bad thing,

we all can use some money,

but the gift of love is lacking,

and can fill all needs completely.


So what gift is in need of more

is something to think about,

digging deep in ones core

choosing right without a doubt?


Remember one gift can be passed,

that is all you have to give.

Want it to forever last,

or for a moment let it live?

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage: 


Beautiful sentiments explored here, but i think it could have been more structured. You seem to lose your way in one or two places, i have some suggestions that migt help tighten your poem up. Lovely sentiments as i've said before, and all in all a good effort. Regards Roscoe..

Roscoe Llane,

Religion will rip your faith off, and return
for the mask of disbelief that's left.

Thank you Roscoe,
I am open to any help you may offer. Please feel free to let me know what it is

author comment
(c) No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.