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Old Shoes (August Contest)
There's many shoes in her closet
From her college years,
The four inch pumps she wore,
She holds up to the light
The pumps she met him in
When she found love, had her first child,
Then jumped the broom.
Now in her silver years,
These shoes she recollects.
Heels, flip flops, sneakers, sandals covers her closet floor
She puts them back in their place.
Last few words:
Rewriting my poetry while my brain is in training.
How is my grammar?
Editing stage:
Contest:
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Comments
Barbara Writes
Tue, 2015-08-04 00:42
Off the top
I like this subject
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
Neopoet Community
Rula
Wed, 2015-08-05 16:13
hello Barbara
An awesome read. I love it.
With some proofreading this is a winner!!
❤❤❤❤❤❤
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Barbara Writes
Fri, 2015-08-07 11:27
Rula
Thanks. Glad you love it. It just maybe be winner for change lol
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
Neopoet Community
scribbler
Thu, 2015-08-06 17:14
Hi Hawaiian honey lol
I like the way you defined the stages of life by the type shoes worn. Where you have "lines" should be line I think. Good luck in contest..........stan
Barbara Writes
Fri, 2015-08-07 11:25
Stan
Thanks. I thought that "s" was wrong. Consider it fixed.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
Neopoet Community
Sparrow
Mon, 2015-08-10 03:42
Barbara
A great write and so much in so few words this is the way some poetry should be.
Yours as always, Ian..
.
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Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti
Barbara Writes
Mon, 2015-08-10 11:48
Ian
Thanks glad to hear that. I may get a win under my belt yet Lol
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
Neopoet Community