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deep hurt
A deep hurt!
at times my heart weeps,
though rarely
when I see machinations
manifested in crooked minds,
seeking the fish from under the Dead Sea
when all are asleep,
wantonly
and
in pity seek a false admiration
to reach out for empathy,
callous folks still exist
I hate to say
but still
Style / type:
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage:
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.
Comments
Rula
Mon, 2012-12-10 07:20
I can
very much relate to this . Palestine , syria and many other places are suffering and we can't do anything but weeping.
Thanks for sharing.
❤❤❤❤❤❤
Please follow me on Instagram https://instagram.com/poetry.jo?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=
loved
Mon, 2012-12-10 10:47
yes each one of us should be able
to relate to this
at some time of one's life
as much as you do tooo
loved
pleiades
Mon, 2012-12-10 18:19
this is a poem where your
this is a poem where your unique writing
style really works.
so often, for me, it doesn't...sorry
the first thing that struck me about this, was
the sense of honesty it contains.
after reading this, there was no doubt in my mind
you meant what you wrote. and, you've expressed
those feelings cohesively, and eloquently
it's a sentiment that could be felt about a
myriad of situations the world over
i very much enjoyed this
thank you
cheers
p
loved
Tue, 2012-12-11 08:40
I am indeed indebted to you
grateful thanks
loved
Ian.T
Mon, 2012-12-10 18:25
Loved
Just like reading a quatrain from some well known Doctor, A little puzzlig but the truth of things that will and do happen.
Well written young Bard, Yours Ian.T
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
loved
Wed, 2012-12-12 09:49
I hionestly appreciate
each word you relay Ian
thanks
loved
weirdelf
Tue, 2012-12-11 01:00
I understand, one of your better poems
But the last line sucks. But still what? 'But still' means nothing. You could do better.
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
loved
Tue, 2012-12-11 08:42
but still
I shall fill in the gap
you visualise
still!
loved