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Autumnal Equinox

Equal day and night
That leads to days of fright
The light of day pours into
Black, dark things that go BOO!

Then wind whips up the crisp leaves
While green needles sway in the breeze
Hats and scarves come out of hiding
While witches their brooms are riding.

The Summer is gone and so are you
But my heart still yearns for a love that's true.
I wait for Winters hoary frost to make
My heart feel less of the ache.

But Fall is here now and I dance
To a merry tune so there's a chance
That I might still find true love
When I swoop down on my broom from above!

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage: 
Contest: 

Comments

Hi WonderWoods, great to see you writing.
Di\d you know that needles you refer to are actually leaves?
I was hoping for continued rhyme at ache. Perhaps break?
It's going great.
Best of luck in the competition,
.

~Mark~

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