Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

AT THE COMPETITION

Submitted by Mallory on Sat, 2018-06-02 18:03

Since the timing
Men still waiting for the great harvest
The eternal begin the giving of corn and the wheat long time ago
Where many dignitaries in this world shall never enter the gate
But shall go by their knees weeping
Some who will be left behind will not they be stained
But they will brought to shame
They shall be consume by fire
And finally become a heap under the sun

Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
Editing stage: 
Editing - rough draft

Comments

Mallory

Sun, 2018-06-03 20:02

Mallory's picture

I knew your judgments here and the're all 100% correct. I think the verse needs a language overhauling for the second time.

That is why i am in Neopoet family. Each and every one us needs 'A Godfather' here that would constantly receive from...especially literary corrections at any point in time.

Thanks Mr Markl for the read and having time to unveil the weeds within the poem.

Ibe Frederick

author comment
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.