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w a v e l e n g t h . . . a n g e l

Submitted by Esker on Wed, 2012-08-22 23:32

sunlight filling up the store
falling in through window/door
falling on the angel there
adiorned in black
whom I adore

Pale skin and tiny hands
the flaxen hair
and tender smile

her eyes are the colour
of heaven
the soft radiant blue
a most amazing hue

Editing stage: 
Editing - rough draft

Comments

Esker

Wed, 2012-08-22 23:34

Esker's picture

and when I wheel in there on my wheels
for coffee or Bunni's treats and shes on shift
it finishs off a day... there are rewards in life
sometimes..there are rays of sunlight
and visions come to life..

(for all muses)

author comment

Ian.T

Thu, 2012-08-23 04:12

Ian.T's picture
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There are many things that make the world seem a wonderful place and it seems that you have just told us of this one, beautifully, Yours Ian.T

Typo:- Line 4 adorned, keep me out of it lol.
Either your fingers are large or the keyboard small ???

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

Esker

Thu, 2012-08-23 08:44

Esker's picture

and I need glasses now But its a typo!!
Thank You

author comment

Esker

Thu, 2012-08-23 21:21

Esker's picture

I had not done a rhyme poem for like ever here
just kept at the free verse and then knocked a
few off... If anyone knows Edgar Allen Poe or
John Milton of the ancient english variety
They are all rhyme people...so that was a clue
from before..

Thank You

author comment

pleiades

Thu, 2012-08-23 22:15

ah wf...the lovelies will always beckon, eh?
(numero uno remember though...)

a gentle, almost tender progression of
personal observation and admiration

the rhyme suits this write

your
m
xx

Esker

Thu, 2012-08-23 22:19

Esker's picture

its your vast intellect and quiet hold
in the seas of tempest and calm

how you walked me along
the wretched ruin of times then

suppose there was a time when I
thought..Hmm maybe I cannot write
Rhyme..BUT guess thats not true!!
Guess I CAN write rhyme

A Bow to you Dear M

Your wf

xx

author comment

pleiades

Thu, 2012-08-23 22:27

i've read a few of yours that have occasional rhyme...i like it
in your work
rather unusual for me, as i don't like rhyme as a rule.

your use of ryme however, has never seemed forced to me, in
any way. it's as all your words are; flowing, natural, almost
stream of consciousness at times

that kind of writing always has
a ring of truth that other styles can
often lack

xx

Esker

Sun, 2012-08-26 03:21

Esker's picture

stream of consxiousness
never ending thoughts on broadcast mode
Output

this world is full of dazzlers and dullards
and I sometimes do a spit and polish on
these old gems with the classic take
of rhyme

we were semi poor and my cousin was wealthy
mon oncle prez of a world large company
but then on his way up
Finch in Toronto when It was still provincial
practically

his family childhood books from an older brother
and then younger sister were the Dr Seuss
books

Abstract beyond mere facts to me
incredible reading then
and yet Miltons works are following the
same template rules

Go Cats Go
and Brave Lucideous
rolling along in their gait
and bravado

Im glad you find my works natural
they come from good masters
and influence

Thank You

author comment

pleiades

Sat, 2012-08-25 22:49

p.s.
you also use rhyme sparingly, rather like a master chef would season a dish...
just enough to enhance and bring out all the other flavours, but never
overpower the main ingredient

Esker

Sat, 2012-08-25 23:11

Esker's picture

People bore easily of Boars
heavy handed recipes

the main ingredient!
My you do have intuition

rhyme for me was never clickety clack
down the rail tracks
that put me to sleep
but the odd uneven sometimes
the lull

give it mystery
make people think

Poetry is not a drive through window
self explanatory
but of the sense
the spirit
the intuition

psycopathy of taste would find it bland

Your comments make me hungry
and I have a thirst for your words

if I may
may I have.....

"more"

(your "W")

author comment

Esker

Sat, 2012-08-25 12:17

Esker's picture

I liked that I just never wrote a Rhyme poem so long here
all the music I listen to
and classical books of poetry I've read
intuitively I just picked it up
and the creative gift for writing
culled a lot of bad poetry I wrote for awhile

subtle poems seemed to last for me

coming from you and your ability to write with such
clarity as you do and pace in your poems
this is a great compliment of my work

Thank You

author comment

weirdelf

Sat, 2012-08-25 22:17

weirdelf's picture
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I used to fall in love every day
where have I lost my way?

But a beautiful poem, I must say
I have gone astray

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

Esker

Sat, 2012-08-25 22:31

Esker's picture

I believe in myself....if I keep at something that I cant get
I know sooner or later I will

I had a worlds weight on me telling me I was no good
they still call to blame me for stuff
Getting mileage out of me

Live a Mythical life and its a public nuisance at times
but it has its charmed days

I did not remain in a church my life
nor give service I did not have a family
that indolently kept their faith while the
rest of life fell apart either

I have never spent time much in the woods
other then the forays through it
about in it fearful and respectul that the true
animals in there belong there and I am
but a two legged visiting

but I had my spiritual side with me all along
and still do

saw too many strange things and had things
occur that had no real rational reason for occurrence

I dont question it
I go with it
I can intuitively feel it
at times

and Ive lost so much that I dont care if I sit
at the table of life or fate knowing I may
lose again

what I have won money cannot buy
nor is it handed freely

love and respect

amazing times still

author comment

weirdelf

Sat, 2012-08-25 22:40

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it is just psychology, but useful.

Then again, sometimes I see elves playing in the trees,
I adore watching beautiful waves in the ocean.

I don't want to be spiritual again, but my delusions and practical psychology give hope.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

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