Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.


Tatata! Tototo! Tuftuftuf!
Ducking and scampering
not a war zone but war of protest
fisty arms speaking out.

Sunflowers made scarlet in mid-day sun
crimsoned from love gone sour -
was there ever love?
Leaders don't surely: reason why
restructuring eloped...

There goes our soured soup
left in the open by menacing thugs
who dares eat it but the dead?
Will they come back alive again?

Curfew curfew here they knock
witting flute played by marshals
goaded by dwellers in Lion House
will it numb the youths to silence?

Will they use force to uphold our lamentation?
that we are thus tagged:
lamentations of the silent youths?

It is night time this side of the river
tell me if it's day time
when I awake.

Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content


will it silence the youths to silences?
Maybe consider the first silence to a change of word to quiet? Or numb? Something like that,
I really feel the pain and anguish of what your country is going through and wish you hope and success.
You tell it well in your poetry.

Also I see your title more like
A Fist of faith. But it's your poem. I'm just leaving my thoughts X

Thank you...Teddy

Many thanks Teddy for the critique and your notes are taken.

We will come out stronger and better. Surely we will.


author comment

good to know. I wish you all well.

Thank you...Teddy

(c) No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.