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surly dampened purity
svelte sweet tonality
in the personality of
tensile pressure
footstep measure

concubine moon
ovid bath
tides sluggish sway
cupped water embraced

brows tested in hot
damp easy structure
forms arched
mouth parted
philtrum thwarted moist

bulb shimmer pulse glow
in urban bloc palatial
a poverty chance

slake a charged mercurial
nymph whipped medusa
drape crown pressed
on wingback ghostly
waiting branch

a night basks
shooting stars
whirlpool sigh
gulp drink the
drops from slender
to delicate toe

in a mirror
the profile
shade slip
cusp of shadow
waiting atop
pastel sighs

cupid's bow

Editing stage: 


surprises, you are! [ in my best Yoda accent ]. I really like the rhyming and the flow. Very nice allusions and no matter the meter, it still flows very well! ~ Gee

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totally experimental this peice!
been listening to more hip hop
and bohemian...and from other
cultures..language videos
Reading translations
word meaning..

found a new understanding of
things that I never come across

Semiotics! basically covers
Its cool..

Glad this worked for you!
I still remember your

Have good one Brother!

author comment

this would be the first ever of your writes that I cannot relate to...
just had to tell you that lol
it just seems too oh I don't know what - i can't think of the word... obtuse, perhaps...
it also seems to have an overabundance of 'clever' words...

anyway, just my opinion
you are an awesome poet, Steve, so no doubt many will disagree with me on this one
love judy

'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)

Writing with no glasses and its aging i used to fight...still do
and it was confrontation I at one time would be there about
and thin skin...However past few years I am learning!
and its easier to see a truth then something constructed
for bait rather then help! Happy with your comment
on this. Plus I get to this level of thinking that is apt
to the cyclic nature of my condition mentally.

Been callee Obtuse by the pro's

Translating these will be interresting
work day...slight overrcast
busy morning house with fam

Semiotics is the philosophy and metaphysic
study of interactions
patterns of that

I will work on coming back here to try
to translate this later
glad you worked through it though

Thank You Judy!

author comment

This is about the third time I have read this
and nearly left it blank until I saw what Judy said, and though there are many things inside this piece,
I couldn't place them all in the same place or time.
Your depth of thought sometimes leaves many outside of your write, scratching away at their heads trying to find up.
Take care Young Wolf, Yours as always Ian..

Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

usually one writes more directly to the intended
pity is a crime
to not us rthyme

however...this is more a "list" which is accurate
of the synapse response to what I see..feel..
internalize..and respond from what My body

Being that I live in my head most of the time
and have a hard time identifying outside that
realm at fifty its a totally new experience to
try to focus and think about the senses
Or sensual side of existance through the
sensations...responses from others..

I can hit the mall and read people...
a hyper awareness brought about by
a critical childhood and teen young
adult and grown adult years

They tore down all walls before five
and it feels like only a small bunker
of Me with the rest of the hilltop
surrounded by the firepower of intellect
and gunned with the Ego
a most skeptical and scary

and then one must go outside the
wire...Always the inquisitors
come forward invading my mind
playing their game against mine
because I see things outside the box
a terrible methodical madness
and unorganized drive

But to me I find fascination in all
ideologies..thoughts..word prompts
from others...One lines a game the
intellects I know throw...We throw
at one another....You cannot live
there all day..Jobs..chores...
normal day to day conversation
which to me are the most boring things

most people call me weird
I make them nervous
they dont like feeling this
and I find most people make
me feel nervous
so to me most of society is

but I push against the normal
reaction to draw away
that would be giving up
and Im very very stubborn

Imagine Love now
or the idea of this concept
all this keen observation
and reaction that I dont
have a clue how to handle
it put it anywhere in this
vast tableau wasteland
dreamland..lah lah land
of my head

except that its a treasure
something valuable

maybe the free style is
an admiration
it overwhelmns me

everyone thinks Im on
but I dont need them

this poem is about
obsession too
and design
its hard to tell
the comparison

its like an angle
I like angles
Im obtuse they say
and some are like
an s curve
a bow wave

maybe its just not meant
to be clearly defined
its a graffitti too

Because I have interesting
eyes and an interesting
voice..very articulate
and book smart..
women lean forward
some like weird very much

and men of the road
admire the strange
out there some confess
some of the man talk
we men speak of in our

the poem is a derevative of all that

thank you...

Listning to Nirvana...
drinking coffee


author comment
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