Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

Rivens and Bones

Tonometric
apse
say bygones
once clutched
and crumpled

sodden and faded
a plying wind
to roll the fates

just another trait
beneath the light
another fete
to celebrate life

Editing stage: 

Comments

A lovely piece that can take you on a journey.

The blood flow is as life itself, though only the physical seed.
It feeds the minds energy, with each days needs.
Then as each fold of the flow closes the stream,
Then enter a world, that will at first seem like a dream.
Yours Ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

at a sketchy busy night time convienance store
they ran cd discs on the overhead speakers..
there was the most unusual of songs played
some dreamy modern threshold peice
whose name i tried to get from the clerk..
hypnotic melodic and trance like..
when i asked the bored out land type clerk
i was told it was all burned cds they played
a completely random event during a
rushed time in the fall..rains....
i was tired....not settled like now
everything was vivid and in a dream state
due to the exhaustion ..stress..
and for unfathomable things..
everything slows down and becomes
very vivid those memories..
and that music which i never got
never heard again is like this.
like the poems i read here sometimes
which i myself find beautiful but
hard to comprehend....
some things are not to understand
or comprehend
they are just beautiful
in leaving a wonder.
a pause of enchantment
and puzzlement

like a magic trick or trip..

one of the reasons i love
this place...so much...

than you...

author comment

thank you i meant....but the missing k changed the whole tone
of the comment.... and i havent used than in years...
i remember how i loved english in school and like math found it
perplexing and mystical...blurry in my head.....

author comment

I would have thought nothing more "than" a typo lol
Yes that is one word we use less now.
I notice that you have been away for a few days
I hope that all is well with you there.
Take care my friend and great to walk with you again.
Yours Ian

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

This left me feeling let down in the ending there was something unsettling about the last stanza but as always you elicited a response from me you always do, the first and second stanza's are tight there is just something I cant put my finger on in the last stanza it maybe me my thoughts and feelings are all over the place at the moment

thanks as always for posting I always learn something new from your writings

love and hugs JC xxx

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

The last stanza like the ending of most movies....
unless they are the indie ones or cult movies to be...

oh phone..gotta...go....

author comment
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.