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'Murica the Beautiful

Another sunken craft gave up
Settled into the silt of shallow water
in the dilapidated marina

The water and tide have been patient
Waiting for decay to exert its' influence
while we pay no attention
to the work that never ceases

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
Last few words: 
I frequently walk by a run-down marina, and have watched the abandoned craft falter and decay over the years. The overall delapidation frequently captures my melancholy with the state of the world.
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

how totally wretched. I can see how that would cause great distress! Can anyone do anything about it? a petition, perhaps?

*hugs, Cat

When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

Thanks Cat. There is planned development along this particular waterfront, so this should take care of itself in time.

Best

Michael Anthony

author comment

glad to read of it.

*hugs, Cat

When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

like the slow decay of our country, huh?
I noted the same metaphorical/anology state myself. Excellent work!
~ Geez.
.

It seems that the days and hours that people
are available for chatroom are staggered and
not a good match for most everyone. How about
if everyone just shows up at the door, whenever
they have a few free minutes?

Thanks Geez!

Michael Anthony

author comment

“On a long enough time line, the survival rate for everyone (everything) drops to zero.“

Chuck Palahnuik

Great quote RA! Thanks for stopping by.

Best

Michael Anthony

author comment
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