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letting go

LETTING GO
Slow indolence
falling into lethargy
lethargy into indifference
nailed to existence
nailed to the earth
I’m slowly giving in

Editing stage: 

Comments

It made me want to shout; Don't give up! Keep on fighting! It made me think about a lot of things...
This resonates with me. I think you might be able to replace the second [nailed] with stuck/glued or something similar. Other than that, I like the form, the words and the effect. ~ Gee

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tis not yet the end
some miracle peeps round the corner
just wake up

loved

Great little poem, I think - simple but quite complex. i agree with geezer, too-but it depends on the effect you wanted. the word repetition sounds like a hammer.

Jenifer

it sounds like a hammer coming down, and like Gee i want to say DONT give up you make me feel for you Joe sometimes its hard to read but its selfish for me not to read

I know you understand

love your Jayne xxx

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

There comes a time when we realize that there ia something stronger than us. That is the time we acqiesce to the limits of the humsn will and that to fight is to make things worse, It is a war I won't win--and the battles are getting harder.Go with thr flow of each day with no expectations except that which is.

love to you all and thanks,

joe

author comment

I hear you Joe

((((((hugs)))))

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

three pains
there are three pains i know of the first is labour and she yells till the one comes out and yells she stops weeping and tears flow of joy now we all know as the voice drowned by the miraculous one.. then she recalls the pain virginous at the hilt when the hymen was split and the joy of pain combined the third pain is when one takes leave and has no more contribution to make the distant horizon bugles a summon leave all behind now let them pain life has to end somehow so wait of what of pain remains..

three pains
there are three pains
I know of,
the first is labour
as she yells
till the one comes out and yells …
she stops weeping as tears flow
of joy now we all know …
as her voice drowns by the miraculous one..

then she recalls the pain
virginous at the hilt
when the hymen was split
and the joy of pain
combined

the third pain is when one takes leave
has no more contribution to make
the distant horizon bugles a summon
leave all behind
now let them pain
life has to end somehow
so weigh of what of pain remains..

loved

Like birthing the soul.

author comment
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