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This poem is part of the contest:

Neopoem Of The Week Contest October 9th to October 15th 2022

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insectoid

a train of a billion ravenous centipedes
circles the earth every morning
looking for their next meal.
each minute,
a helpless prey is drawn into this mass,
ripped into pieces for consumption
before the metamorphosis.
then a cocoon for shelter,
a carapace for skin,
a mandible for lips.
emerges another insect to wander
slithering beneath office tables at night,
and hard-to-clean spaces,
at extra cold storage rooms when no one else is looking,
on scrap piles illuminated by city lights
that are varying shades of green.

— Celso G. Tertins, Oct 11, 2022

About This Poem

Review Request Direction: What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Country/Region: Republic of the Philippines.

Favorite Poets: Pablo Neruda, Allen Ginsberg, F. Garcia Llorca, Langston Hughes

More from this author

Critiques

Rosewood Apothecary

Rosewood Apothecary

3 years 7 months ago

I liked

Being quicksilver better. This one has me a Kafka this morning. Bugs and coffee like Naked Lunch.

Tim

Geezer

Geezer

3 years 7 months ago

Yes...

perfect! The pacing is much like the fast centipedes I see slither along the cracks in the basement next to the washing machine when I turn on the light. I see your background of Sci-fi consumption in evidence here. I have noted that many
Sci-fi authors have taken animal life from the natural world and enlarged upon their unique aspects to bring us monsters.
Nice stuff!
~ Geezer.
.