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Inevitable

An affair is brewing

Breaking up complicated
too much to arrange
solicitors, family, pain

I just need something
our sitting room (internet cáfe)
is stifling, smothering
communication, zilch
vacant stares
minds elsewhere

Don't know what to do
but attention I need
before, incomprehensible
now, understandable

An affair is brewing

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing stage: 

Comments

just a poem but it is a sad one x

author comment

a great piece. the word usage is great and it reads with emotions of great pain for the things that will be lost. it pains to love and lost! beautiful poem!

Hi thanks so much for enjoying this one have a great day x

author comment

good insightful piece about modern man's alienation "our sitting room" (internet cafe) - "is stifling, smothering communication". How true too, "the vacant stares" and "minds elsewhere".
I think it would carry more impact here and there, if you used punctuation more effectively viz.
"Don't know what to do,
but attention I need.
Before, 'incomprehensible'
Now, 'understandable'..."
See how that works for you!
Regards

Bonitaj

Hi I'll work on the punctuation thanks so much for enjoying this one have a great day x

author comment

I hope this is just a poem, its a sad tale of a marriage breaking up or on the verge of serious problems, I thought this one bared a little of your soul, its how we get to know each other round here, bit by bit our stories come out in our poetry to some degree

nice work hun

love JC xxx

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

hi jc maybe just a bad day lol just a poem for now glad you enjoyed cheers Suebx

author comment

Please please do not expect anything in human relationships especially marriage
An affair is brewing,
Lawyers Re suing
I don't care a damn
He's with a man
The man is a tart
Not after his heart
He'll come back to me
Just wait and see
And will I forgive him
No I'll just sing
Bye bye sh.t
As I dig his pit!

i'm fine french f i write about anything today were fine good actually x

author comment

Focus elsewhere. That is the key. Otherwise you will become obsessed, obsessive, obsessional, none of which is good. You need a life outside the husband. He is not the be all and end all of existence.
Look outward. Xxxxx

thanks frenchf x

author comment

We all have bad days just look to the next, My partner and I have bad days like everyone but we get through, them we have been together for nearly 12 years this year not bad for a couple that werent ever meant to go out we are chalk and cheese but it works for us ...

hugs JC xxx

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

thanks Jc opposites attract all the best sueb x

author comment
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