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GRIEF
GRIEF
What words are worth the telling
when they have been told before.
there are no eyes to see
beyond what they want to see
more than they want to know..
What is this thing called “grief”
that makes us suffer so
what heart embraces another
lost to its own humanity.
What words of consolation
where there are none.
Each of us dances in circles
like planets around the sun
never touching
never knowing the other one.
Last few words:
No-one can truly understand the depths of another man's pain,
Editing stage:
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Comments
weirdelf
Tue, 2013-12-24 08:13
oops
wrong post, wrong place, sorry Joe
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
William Saint George
Tue, 2013-12-24 08:04
Hey
I absolutely love the last stanza! I think it's brilliant :)
No verse is free for the man who wants to do a good job. - TS Eliot
http://www.wsgeorge.com/
Geremia
Tue, 2013-12-24 08:08
Thanks, William, A title
Thanks, William, A title change may do the trick for the poem as a true experience,
China Blue
Tue, 2013-12-24 09:00
Joe
Hello old friend. I too liked the last stanza it speaks volumes. Yes it is so true that no man can understand the depths of another s grief or pain
Chrys
Let your mercy spill on all these burning hearts in hell(Leonard Cohen)
Geremia
Tue, 2013-12-24 09:47
it is my dilemma, So good to
it is my dilemma, So good to see you again.
love,
joe
weirdelf
Wed, 2013-12-25 05:03
It is the ultimate alienation,
eloquently stated.
What I just said sounds cold.
What the poem says is profoundly distressing, as it should be.
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
weirdelf
Wed, 2013-12-25 05:15
I would consider changing the title,
but you might need to coin new word!.
[grins]
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
William Saint George
Wed, 2013-12-25 07:32
Lost??
This title doesn't work well for me :-/
No verse is free for the man who wants to do a good job. - TS Eliot
http://www.wsgeorge.com/
Rula
Wed, 2013-12-25 10:49
If it was mine
I wish (btw)... I would lable it something like "Dancing in the Dark"
Great closing lines.
❤❤❤❤❤❤
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reepa
Wed, 2013-12-25 15:41
i see it and know loss. i
i see it and know loss. i simply love it
Seren
Fri, 2013-12-27 11:17
Dearest Joe
I had to see what you've been writing before I sneak off to bed
that last Stanza is outstanding and the whole poem is well written
you have a talent for touching emotions some of us are still striving to emote
loved this Joe
your Jayne with much love xxxx
“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats
weirdelf
Mon, 2014-01-06 14:05
One year
three months
twenty five days
after Jason's death I awoke this morning from a dream where I had brought him back to life by surrendering my own and the grief was as strong as when he died.
Thank you Joe, this poem retains it's power in making me feel less alone in the loneliest of places.
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
Geremia
Mon, 2014-01-06 16:49
It hurts forever. it seems.
It hurts forever. it seems. It is the loneliest of places. I feel it each day.
My best to you, Jess, for a healing that will bring you to better place.
Joe