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BREAKING INTO FANDANGO--edit

Submitted by Geremia on Mon, 2012-08-20 12:00

BREAKING INTO FANDANGO
Twists and turns
ragged edges
and right angles
circles broken
crashing
into perpendicular
chaotic serendipity
chance or destiny
then suddenly
life’s madness
breaking into bleeding
or fandango….

Editing stage: 
Editing - rough draft

Comments

Ian.T

Tue, 2012-08-21 11:36

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A dance of the mind I guess that falls off a little in the closing stages,
as all things even the music stops..
You take care young Joe and know we are thinking of you, Yours Ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

Geremia

Tue, 2012-08-21 13:12

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Fandango :)

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weirdelf

Wed, 2012-08-22 10:06

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An extraordinary contraindication.

I suspect a typo on the line
'thn suddenly'
did you mean
''then suddenly'?

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

Geremia

Wed, 2012-08-22 10:20

Geremia's picture

Yes, thanks, It should read "then"

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