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Understanding Eve

Her name was
born and bred
from the fertile earth of Eden
where seduction slid
between her virgin feet,
spoke to her with pretty words,
then promised seraphic enlightenment.

It seems rather unfair,
thinking of poor Eve,
to have been so tempted,
taunted, and tried.
She had no way to know,
did she, the real consequence
of eating forbidden fruit.
There was no label listing allergens,
no WHO warning of global effects.

Just the party-gone-wild elation
captured in one bite,
suckled and nursed until her
eyes were opened
to her nakedness,
to her inferior mind
while all the sins of future mankind
were sentenced and shackled
to her flawless skin.

From this, we were
introduced to Woman
through written word,
passed along for ages,
governed by incessant
control and superiority.

To Eve,
Mother of All Living, you share
courage with hearts of soldiers,
knowledge with minds of scholars,
hold favor in the soul of humankind
where you are now known
as Sister.
***

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

She gets the blame but Adam was exercising free will when he took that bite.I appreciate you reminding folks that eve is the mother of all now walking around. Now I'll shut up before somebody accuses me of being a feminist lol

Thank you for dropping in to read and comment!
L

author comment

Amusing ...! @ Scribbler
.

"Poetry is invariably imbued with a sense of calm and serenity".

~Jackweb

all that stuff about Eve being the one who succumbed first; personally, I think it was Adam, and the MEN that wrote that stuff down, were making her take the blame. A nice job of shifting the blame, if you ask me. A somewhat humorous view of the
original sin huh? Nice job. ~ Geez.
.

Writing purely for oneself, is the ultimate in defensive posture.

I'd have to agree that somewhere through time and telling - Eve was given a bum wrap!
Thank you!
L

author comment

EVE OR ADAM
all human creation both saw with opened eyes

wow what difference
apples bananas snakes peaches oranges who could ever resist none even till today so we all continue to say repeat it every day heavens still say both have been placed equal now all say
man woman
woe of men

Thank you for reading!
L

author comment

I've read this a number of times now as it is quite intriguing. If you are looking for moderate critique, I'd like to point out some issues I have with S2 and how it marries to the rest of the piece.
The bulk of the poem I find a measure of sensuality in, really strong and descriptive. Timeless imagery and foreboding tragedy.
Stanza 2 is watery by comparison and almost looks like it was added in after your muse took flight. I think if you work at this stanza, you could bring it up to the level of the others. You're obviously capable.
Specifically, the mention of WHO and "warning labels" detracts from the sensuality of the piece.

I hope you will work at this piece.

Thomas

.
.

...so like my lost dreams...the flood

Thank you so much for reading so closely. S2 was to draw in a bit of today's many warnings we are given to avoid our inner and outer sins of the flesh, as it were. I agree it is a distraction, and actually was meant to be. I can also see that it takes away from the feel of the poem. I will strongly consider your suggestions, and am so grateful you stopped by. This is definitely a piece in the works.
L

author comment
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