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Soothing Projections

Imagining to understand
causes my head to throb,
so I write to alleviate,

it relaxes the air
and I become the rain
pounding the roof.

the beep beep of the clock
and no moments are hidden,

the cold distance between planets
and my marrow freezes over,

the tire pinches the pebble
and I'm the low hum of the road ...

but I'm home
nursing my head.

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words: 
an old one revisited recently
Editing stage: 


Thank you for the kind words,
I liked the low hum too, relaxing.

author comment

The old testament! goodness, thank

Usually I write because I have to
write it down to remember it lol,
even when its drivel.

thank you for your visit

author comment

Nice sounds and images. tells it as it is. I don't know why else we do this ridiculous thing.

(not sure about the title- you know, the projection sounds more like a cinema thing, and kinda leads me away from the poem not into it...)

great poem!

I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing
than teach ten thousand stars how not to dance
ee cummings

Projector didn't cross my mind, but now
it does. I was going for "projecting" myself
in soothing (debatable) situations ... I'm
old school too, now I see the antique film
projector barely working in the middle of
the room lol ... not married to the title, I like
to add something or at least be theme based,
got any suggestions?

author comment

and yet the ideas come through so clearly. Nice. ~ Gee.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

Thank you sir, I'm old, all my bones
are bare.

author comment

Projecting onto a blank piece of paper, or a blank canvas... Or in my case, projectile vomiting into a notebook ;)

Nice work. Has a pleasant buzz and, um, hummmm.

Thank you for reading and commenting,
glad you liked it

author comment

Not bad for a free verse...Just kidding lol.Second stanza. I'm not sure what you want to convey. If it's the perseverance of a pounding head then leave it as is. If it's a temporary reprieve then maybe change"pounding" to playing or some other more pleasant verb. Whichever I liked this........stan

Hmm ... pounding; what I was trying to
get was like the rushing pounding on a
tin roof ... thanks, I'll need to address that.

author comment

I enjoyed reading this piece, your lines held me in poetic grip with their impact.
'The distance between....
- very potent indeed!

Glad you liked this short spin
of head and ache ...

author comment

I like this poem a lot.
I was just thinking that maybe you could say, "The sound of the clock beeping," instead of, "The beep beep of the clock." But I'm not sure. Maybe that's what you meant to do.

Thank you for reading and offering
suggestions, a poem can usually be
improved ... thank you!!!

author comment

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