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Snow White

Her poison apple wasn’t poison at all
In fact it was a boy standing six foot tall
Dark and mysterious seemingly sweet
It’s no surprise she would fall
So maybe he was a diamond in the mines
But apple or no apple
He was toxic
She died

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

of sarcasm here? I like it, but the abrupt switch from rhyme to free verse threw me. It stopped me cold in the middle!
The brevity of it, sort of made up for it, but... You seem to have all the elements of the Snow White story here with a twist ending. ~ Geezer.
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It seems that the days and hours that people
are available for chatroom are staggered and
not a good match for most everyone. How about
if everyone just shows up at the door, whenever
they have a few free minutes?

may I suggest you switch line three with line four and continue your rhyming pattern
just a suggestion

Chrys

check out our chat room open to all 24/7

Casual, succinct and complete, this poem has economy seldomly seen. The message is clear.

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...so like my lost dreams...the flood

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