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By-line

Words create my livelihood
Marking every bad and good
Hatred, fighting, wars, and peace
Fill the news; when will it cease?

Hard love and heartbreak drive my dreams
Tearing tales apart at seams.
Ripped from the darkness of my heart
The first sentence tells the truest part.

While rhyme and rhythm guide my soul
An always constant push and pull—
I live these tales with every breath
These words sing both of life and death.

An author, poet, journalist
Just words on an eternal list.
There’s such a choice in what I write
To blind a man or give him sight.

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Last few words: 
Hey, thanks for reading! I'd love some help with my title, if you have any good ideas. I also welcome any other critiques you have!
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

to think of a description of what you do for a living. I am going to take a wild guess at you being a professional writer? Or at least, the ambition to be one. Your last stanza gives that impression. I thought that maybe you could use the title "By-line"?
Just a thought.

I would use a shorter line for the second line of the second stanza.

"Tearing tales apart at seams" gives the whole idea, and makes it smoother.

I would also use [and] instead of [or] in "An always constant push [and] pull".

How about: "I live these tales [with] every breath. [again, a smoother sound]

"To blind a man or give him sight"?

Just a couple of ideas to give it a smoother sound. Of course, it's up to you as always,
to use or keep any ideas or suggestions. ~ Geez.
.

It seems that the days and hours that people
are available for chatroom are staggered and
not a good match for most everyone. How about
if everyone just shows up at the door, whenever
they have a few free minutes?

Thank you so much for the feedback and the critiques! I was really wrestling with a lot of those lines you pointed out, and I'll go edit the poem now. Thank you! :D

And yes, though I'm still building my career, currently I'm a freelance journalist working on college degrees in communication.

..................................................
https://meanderingbackward.blogspot.com
"The true alchemists do not turn lead into gold; they turn the world into words." -William H. Gass

author comment

I'm glad if I can help. I think that journalism is one of the greatest professions. Always tell the truth, at least if some people hate you, you will have done some good. ~ Geez.
.

It seems that the days and hours that people
are available for chatroom are staggered and
not a good match for most everyone. How about
if everyone just shows up at the door, whenever
they have a few free minutes?

Yes!!! There's so much chaos and misinformation in the news today, and my last line was kind of trying to lean into that choice I could have to either spread light and knowledge, or shroud the truth.

..................................................
https://meanderingbackward.blogspot.com
"The true alchemists do not turn lead into gold; they turn the world into words." -William H. Gass

author comment

feel the revised version
learner as I still be
at nearing
+80
free lance poieter
I of neo be

Those last two lines fall perfectly! Thanks for the kind words. :)

..................................................
https://meanderingbackward.blogspot.com
"The true alchemists do not turn lead into gold; they turn the world into words." -William H. Gass

author comment

Oh, yes, that's a good point, especially since the poem can be rather confusing about my profession! OoOOh What about something like "A Wordly Profession?" XD XD Sorry, that was terrible, I just couldn't help myself!

Yes, Geezer gives great advice! Thanks!

..................................................
https://meanderingbackward.blogspot.com
"The true alchemists do not turn lead into gold; they turn the world into words." -William H. Gass

author comment

I enjoyed the lines and stanzas, informative as they're poetic. Thanks for the piece. And look forward for more.

Bathe yourself with poetry and let the world go to pieces.

Thanks for the kind words; I really appreciate it. :)

..................................................
https://meanderingbackward.blogspot.com
"The true alchemists do not turn lead into gold; they turn the world into words." -William H. Gass

author comment

Hello, Asche,
Fantastic poem! Incredible last two lines - judging by the energy of the rest of the poem, I believe you've made a clear choice.
Thank you!
L

Thank you so much! I appreciate you taking the time to read it! :)

..................................................
https://meanderingbackward.blogspot.com
"The true alchemists do not turn lead into gold; they turn the world into words." -William H. Gass

author comment
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