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THE LIGHTHOUSE - Poem for Gautama Buddha

Submitted by Leonard on Tue, 2014-07-29 03:47

He sat
focussed on the questions
of life
determined not to get up until
he had the answers
A dark, dense shadow
seeped out of his body
and stained the earth
He became a light source
for millions to be guided by
for two and a half millennia

Written on 30/03/2008

Editing stage: 
Editing - rough draft

Comments

Ian.T

Thu, 2014-07-31 04:16

Ian.T's picture
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That the title gave the purpose of the poem or write then I think that the poem on its own would have failed.
I am sure you could depict many of the good things about Buddha so that the title could have been just "The Lighthouse"
Just my mind not seeing after the title, where is the intrigue, the specific lilt of his ways without title.
Yours Ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

Leonard

Sat, 2014-08-02 04:20

Leonard's picture

However I wrote this somewhere around 2007. Unfurtunately I have lost the connect. So I am not sure whether I will be able to make the necessary changes.

Thanks anyway the your insightful comments.

Leonard

Leonard Daranjo

"When the waiting stops, the living begins"

author comment

weirdelf

Tue, 2014-08-05 03:32

weirdelf's picture
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there is an 'Edit' tab. Click it, make changes, save. The old version is not lost and you can compare versions.
That's what Neopoet is about, we grow poems, not set them in stone mausoleums.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

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