Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

Gimme Shelter

The Stones and the Ramones
Social Distortion, out of the LA Punk scene
even Miles and Coltrane
She doesn’t need them

Still, in that void, there is a rhythm
found in her eyes, and in her heart
I let the sound sweep over me
It makes its own music

I listen to it over and over
A melody so beautiful
it can make you feel sorry
for blueberry pie

Her music has a piano
that finds our note of joy,
and a saxophone too,
that cries soulfully
somehow saying what I feel

I don’t know if she understands
the music she makes for me like I do
even though I can hear it plainly
simply when she breathes

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

i read any I find with an interest unequaled in most other poetry. it"s just me, with a rich history of music. attempting as you did to give the "flavor" of bands to the first stanzas... and you gave it a beautiful turn at the end. nice

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Raywhitakerblog.wordpress.com
- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Appreciate your thoughts Ray. Wrestled with the last stanza, but was happy with how this turned out.

Best
Mike

Michael Anthony

author comment

I hear a hint of jazz in this peace, nice twist at the end, I can't help feeling envious to who ever she is, I wouldn't mind being so appreciated.
I adore your title as ever a wonderful read.

Thank you...Teddy

Glad you enjoyed this one Teddy. Sometimes we get lucky in love, but there was a LOT of bad luck too.

Best
Mike

Michael Anthony

author comment

*applauds* This poem is so sweet and magical, and I can almost hear the music of it in my mind. "A melody so beautiful it can make you feel sorry for blueberry pie" Perfect!!

Fantastic job :)

..................................................
https://meanderingbackward.blogspot.com
"The true alchemists do not turn lead into gold; they turn the world into words." -William H. Gass

Thanks Asche! The silly thing was how much thought I put into which kind of pie to use. =)

Michael Anthony

author comment
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.